topic Re: Am I being a bit precious? in Community Spirit

Am I being a bit precious?

tulip*place — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 00:49:29 GMT

A little precious maybe but it hurts. DD was invited by her BFF to a trivia night at a local club.

BFF & BFF’s mum were going and they were to pick up DD on the way past. I mentioned to DD that if it was Ok with them I’d like to come. DD asked and the answer was “ your mum wouldn’t want to come in our car as it’s a bit dirty, you can take your car”. I was surprised and DD said if I wanted to come she would take her car.. therefore I didn’t go . DD was picked up, sat in the back with BFF and

BFF’s mum drove in the front on her own. I mentioned to DD that I was a bit upset and she couldn't understand why. How would you feel?

Re: Am I being a bit precious?

newstart2380 — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 00:53:22 GMT

A little precious maybe but it hurts. DD was invited by her BFF to a trivia night at a local club.

BFF & BFF’s mum were going and they were to pick up DD on the way past. I mentioned to DD that if it was Ok with them I’d like to come. DD asked and the answer was “ your mum wouldn’t want to come in our car as it’s a bit dirty, you can take your car”. I was surprised and DD said if I wanted to come she would take her car.. therefore I didn’t go . DD was picked up, sat in the back with BFF and

BFF’s mum drove in the front on her own. I mentioned to DD that I was a bit upset and she couldn't understand why. How would you feel?

Firstly so I can get the story straight please tell me

what is DD

what is BFF

Re: Am I being a bit precious?

tulip*place — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 00:56:52 GMT

DD, dear daughter.

BFF, best friends forever.

Re: Am I being a bit precious?

newstart2380 — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 01:06:09 GMT

Firstly so I can get the story straight please tell me

what is DD

what is BFF

Some people don't put their brain into gear before opening their mouth, hurtful yes particularly if BFF's mum drove in the front by herself. She is obviously ashamed and knows her car is dirty so she should take some time and clean it. Tomorrow you will feel better and your hurt will lessen BUT it will be stored in the memory bank for future reference if required.

Re: Am I being a bit precious?

the_hawk* — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 01:24:04 GMT

BFF’s mum most likely thought you were being a bit rude and that you could take your own car and take DD and it would save her having to pick DD up

Re: Am I being a bit precious?

tulip*place — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 01:27:28 GMT

BFF’s mum most likely thought you were being a bit rude and that you could take your own car and take DD and it would save her having to pick DD up

Thanks the_hawk, that would explain it. They were driving past the house on the way.

Re: Am I being a bit precious?

the_hawk* — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 02:12:25 GMT

Your welcome, it was just a thought

Perhaps she had stuff on the front seat/ floor and didn't want to move it.

Re: Am I being a bit precious?

bright.ton42 — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 02:33:29 GMT

I think hawk could be right.

Re: Am I being a bit precious?

green.fields — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 02:47:59 GMT

Sorry your upset Tulip, guess I would be as well.

How well do you know the other Mum.

How hard is it to give the inside of a car a bit of a clean up. In all honesty she probably didn't want you to come which is very hurtful to you, I would store this incident in the back of my mind for future reference😄

I would never again put myself in that position.

Re: Am I being a bit precious?

azureline** — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 03:02:01 GMT

Personally, I would have called the bff's mum and asked her if she would mind if you came along. Next time, if there is one, offer to drive and call the mum with an invite.

Re: Am I being a bit precious?

bright.ton42 — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 04:45:43 GMT

Things like that are hurtful though

Re: Am I being a bit precious?

tulip*place — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 05:15:36 GMT

Thanks for your replies. Both girls have gone through high school together, therefore we've sat at the same table at school functions, I was invited to the daughters 21st and they were at my daughters 21st.... DD later told me that when they came to pick her up they did ask if I still wanted to go with them.

Re: Am I being a bit precious?

icyfroth — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 05:24:38 GMT

I think it was rude.

Re: Am I being a bit precious?

azureline** — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 07:18:12 GMT

Thanks for your replies. Both girls have gone through high school together, therefore we've sat at the same table at school functions, I was invited to the daughters 21st and they were at my daughters 21st.... DD later told me that when they came to pick her up they did ask if I still wanted to go with them.

so, it appears your daughter is at fault?

Re: Am I being a bit precious?

tulip*place — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 08:18:22 GMT

[

They asked because their conscience maybe got the better of them and for them

to not look so bad, by the time DD was picked up I wasn't really in the mood to socialise

with them after being refused in the first time.

Re: Am I being a bit precious?

i-once-was-bump — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 09:19:09 GMT

You did invite yourself so maybe that is why the others suggested you drive yourself.

May be you should think about why they didn't invite you and when you invited yourself why they wanted to change the transport arrangements.

Re: Am I being a bit precious?

tulip*place — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 10:11:48 GMT

You did invite yourself so maybe that is why the others suggested you drive yourself.

May be you should think about why they didn't invite you and when you invited yourself why they wanted to change the transport arrangements.

Itt's the first time the mother went with them for a night out, and the reason was the car was dirty. That's their excuse. I know if I'm taking someone out in my car I make sure its reasonably tidy, think that is the pretty normal isn't it?

Re: Am I being a bit precious?

j*oono — Thu, 14 Mar 2013 10:36:22 GMT

That explains a lot Tulip. This is the first time that the mother was going on a girls night with her daughter and for you to ask to come along she maybe felt that she wanted to have a night with her daughter and not another adult and came up with the weird car is dirty excuse.

Afterwards, she felt silly and it would still be fun if you came along and so they offered when they picked your daughter up.

Either that or the car was a pigsty, but I wouldn't take it to heart because you don't know the reason.

Re: Am I being a bit precious?

i-once-was-bump — Fri, 15 Mar 2013 06:50:39 GMT

tulip I read it as the other mum didn't really want you there, why, I don't know.

The fact that they didn't ask you might be because you are too nice.

Why not ask your daughter about it so that should a similar situation come up in the future you will know whether or not to go along?

Re: Am I being a bit precious?

icyfroth — Sat, 16 Mar 2013 08:18:35 GMT

have you gone back to being bump?