topic Re: On The First Date, Would You... in Community Spirit

On The First Date, Would You...

icyfroth — Wed, 14 Aug 2013 02:56:48 GMT

...let the guy pay for dinner or do you insist on paying your own?

This came up for discussion in yesterday's breakfast show.

Sami believes the guy should pay on the first date, its a chivalrous gesture.

Yumi says absolutely not, it's sexist, old-fashioned and old.

Re: On The First Date, Would You...

Anonymous — Wed, 14 Aug 2013 03:02:05 GMT

Call me old fashioned then... meh!

Re: On The First Date, Would You...

Anonymous — Wed, 14 Aug 2013 03:03:15 GMT

Oops.... to you Icy.

Re: On The First Date, Would You...

crystal**flake — Wed, 14 Aug 2013 03:09:30 GMT

I think the man should not only pay for the first date but for the first few dates.

Re: On The First Date, Would You...

j*oono — Wed, 14 Aug 2013 03:10:38 GMT

Hell yeah!

Re: On The First Date, Would You...

azureline** — Wed, 14 Aug 2013 03:21:42 GMT

yes and forever after........ I pay if I go out with friends but my OH pays if he is with me.

Re: On The First Date, Would You...

newstart2380 — Wed, 14 Aug 2013 03:22:53 GMT

If he asks you out for dinner or coffee he should pay, if you agree to meet for either maybe offer but why not to loud, call me old fashioned but I still like it when the man opens the car door or steps aside to let you through a door first.

Re: On The First Date, Would You...

freakiness — Wed, 14 Aug 2013 03:31:24 GMT

@icyfroth wrote:
...let the guy pay for dinner or do you insist on paying your own?

This came up for discussion in yesterday's breakfast show.

Sami believes the guy should pay on the first date, its a chivalrous gesture.

Yumi says absolutely not, it's sexist, old-fashioned and old.

Whichever rule applies make sure you agree first.

I think it's old fashioned to expect the man to pay, but each situation and event is different and I'd decide accordingly.

Re: On The First Date, Would You...

cat_mioux — Wed, 14 Aug 2013 03:35:38 GMT

If a guy asked me out on a date then yes I'd expect him to pay for me and I'd expect him to open doors for me too.

After the first date .... I'd probably pay for myself.

Anyway it's a moot point. I don't want to date. A couple of guys have asked if I wanted to go for a 'drink' after work. I replied 'hell no'.

Re: On The First Date, Would You...

newstart2380 — Wed, 14 Aug 2013 03:36:39 GMT

@freakiness wrote:
@icyfroth wrote:
...let the guy pay for dinner or do you insist on paying your own?

This came up for discussion in yesterday's breakfast show.

Sami believes the guy should pay on the first date, its a chivalrous gesture.

Yumi says absolutely not, it's sexist, old-fashioned and old.
Whichever rule applies make sure you agree first.
I think it's old fashioned to expect the man to pay, but each situation and event is different and I'd decide accordingly.

but if you pay half (when HE asked you out) and you don't see him again you are out of pocket, MMMMM much better the money in your wallet.

Re: On The First Date, Would You...

illicit69 — Wed, 14 Aug 2013 03:54:18 GMT

Like Dixo, I’m old fashioned (never did burn my bra), if a man asks you out for dinner or drinks, he pays, picks me up from home, does not beep the horn but comes to the door, opens the car door, then upon return to my home walks me to my front door. Worked every time for me, and O/H still open the car door for me.

Re: On The First Date, Would You...

soul_art — Wed, 14 Aug 2013 04:06:07 GMT

I think the person who does the asking is the one who should pay. After that if there are more dates, it can be talked about so both are happy with the arrangements.

Re: On The First Date, Would You...

cherry*135 — Wed, 14 Aug 2013 04:29:21 GMT

Maybe on the first date the person who asked the other one out for dinner/drinks should pay.

I would prefer to pay 1/2 each, then I wouldn't feel obligated to see them again after the first date, if you didn't like them much.

Be interesting to know if people in their 20's (with jobs, not poor Uni students) still go for the male pays for dinner/drinks thing.

I can open my own car door.

Re: On The First Date, Would You...

freakiness — Wed, 14 Aug 2013 04:34:10 GMT

@newstart2380 wrote:
@freakiness wrote:
@icyfroth wrote:
...let the guy pay for dinner or do you insist on paying your own?

This came up for discussion in yesterday's breakfast show.

Sami believes the guy should pay on the first date, its a chivalrous gesture.

Yumi says absolutely not, it's sexist, old-fashioned and old.
Whichever rule applies make sure you agree first.
I think it's old fashioned to expect the man to pay, but each situation and event is different and I'd decide accordingly.
but if you pay half (when HE asked you out) and you don't see him again you are out of pocket, MMMMM much better the money in your wallet.

I said nothing about paying half. If I didn't want to see him again best I paid for myself than owe him a dinner after he paid for the first one, especially if he is one of those who equate paying for dinner or coming in for coffee as in invitation for sex.

Re: On The First Date, Would You...

i-need-a-martini — Wed, 14 Aug 2013 04:40:41 GMT

@freakiness wrote:

I said nothing about paying half. If I didn't want to see him again best I paid for myself than owe him a dinner after he paid for the first one, especially if he is one of those who equate paying for dinner or coming in for coffee as in invitation for sex.

Agree.

I would never let a guy pay on the first and subsequent few dates. Anything beyond that can be worked out mutually.

Re: On The First Date, Would You...

cherry*135 — Wed, 14 Aug 2013 04:48:43 GMT

but if you pay half (when HE asked you out) and you don't see him again you are out of pocket, MMMM

If you pay 1/2 the costs with another person for a meal, you are hardly out of pocket, you did get a meal to eat.

The poor man could be seriously out of pocket, if he kept asking females out for a meal which he paid for and they just used him as a meal ticket.

Re: On The First Date, Would You...

icyfroth — Wed, 14 Aug 2013 07:07:07 GMT

If a guy asks me out to dinner, I expect him to pay. If he doesn't. there's no second date.

OH still pays when we go to lunch or dinner together.

Yumi says Sami earns more money than the guy in some cases and she should offer to pay.

Sami says it's not about the money, it's the gesture. It's chivalrous and romantic.

Hi Dixo right back atcha.

I have to go be back later.

Re: On The First Date, Would You...

nicnacs_4u — Wed, 14 Aug 2013 07:11:27 GMT

Yes please

Re: On The First Date, Would You...

icyfroth — Wed, 14 Aug 2013 07:13:20 GMT

nicbuddy

Re: On The First Date, Would You...

freakiness — Wed, 14 Aug 2013 07:47:30 GMT

@icyfroth wrote:
If a guy asks me out to dinner, I expect him to pay. If he doesn't. there's no second date.

What does he get out of it?

Does it make a difference if he earns less?