topic Re: What Do You Expect Your Family in Community Spirit

What Do You Expect Your Family

grandmoon — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 08:24:55 GMT

to do with your Treasures and possessions after you die??

I was asked this today by a friend who is very upset the her Son in law has told her he will send all of her to the tip.

Re: What Do You Expect Your Family

just_me_karen — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 08:32:04 GMT

Then she should update her will and leave the treasured possessions to someone who'd appreciate and care for it.

Re: What Do You Expect Your Family

grandmoon — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 08:37:16 GMT

Neither of her 2 daughters want what she calls her treasures.

Re: What Do You Expect Your Family

imastawka — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 08:39:32 GMT

My daughter's going to make a lot of money on ebay! She says she will keep great grandma's china, but who knows. I won't be here to give her grief over it

Re: What Do You Expect Your Family

just_me_karen — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 08:45:34 GMT

She doesn't have to leave it to her children. She could leave it to friends, even a cats home lol.

My grandmother left instructions in her will, to give one piece of her china collection to each of the volunteers at the smith family (she volunteered there for 50 yrs) and they were thrilled to have a small memory of her. She left her house to her grandchildren, her money to her great grandchildren and nothing to her kids...not because she didn't like them, but she figured they didn't need it.

Then she left the entire contents of her house to the smith family as a donation. Lots of people do that and it's a good way to know your possessions will be contributing to the greater good.

Re: What Do You Expect Your Family

crystal**flake — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 08:50:15 GMT

Keep the good stuff and give away the rest I guess.

Re: What Do You Expect Your Family

imastawka — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 08:55:41 GMT

I'm a tad cynical about leaving possessions to charity. I've personally known cases

where the volunteer workers have taken the cream of the crop for themselves. And

now, with "work for the dole" there are even more "volunteers in the charity workforce.

Re: What Do You Expect Your Family

nevillesdaughter — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 08:58:56 GMT

My Mum (mid 70's and with heaps of "stuff") regularly has conversations with me and my 2 siblings. Some personal items like jewellery, she has nominated who gets what in her actual will and with all her "stuff" - lots of antiques, china, artworks, collectables - she keeps a handwritten list (which she regularly has to update because she keeps buying), according tou our individual tastes. Foe example, she has a massive collection of antique bottles which I can appreciate from an historical point of view, and am always interested in hearing about, but definitely don't want to spend the rest of my days dusting the bloody things. Ditto my siter, but my brother loves them - he gets 'em. Sister doesn't like old stuff - so gets the more modern gear. I love art and antiques, so that's me sorted (she'll probably leave me Dad too).

Of course, every now and then, if we all get too cheeky and disrespectful, she says she's leaving it all to the cats' home!

Cheers,

Marina.

Re: What Do You Expect Your Family

*elizabeths-mum* — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 09:10:32 GMT

It wouldn't worry me if the volunteers did take the cream of it, although I think more charities are getting stricter about that.

I think my bunch are planning on getting someone from the local antique shop in (after they have all finished fighting over the items they want) then the rest can go to charity. I won't be here to fret.

I think your friend's sil could have been a little more sensitive, grand moon.

Re: What Do You Expect Your Family

spotweldersfriend — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 09:13:50 GMT

I'm taking all my music with me to the afterlife. There are only so many Gregorian chants I can listen to. I'm gonna liven up that place with Miles and Charlie:-)

Re: What Do You Expect Your Family

the_hawk* — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 09:24:55 GMT

Most peoples special things are only special or value to them because they have memories attached to them.

The best way to make sure your wishes are granted is to give the special things you treasue is to give them to the people that have expressed interest in them while you are alive.

Re: What Do You Expect Your Family

lurker17260 — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 09:44:42 GMT

I agree hawk. My mum has already started giving away things that are special (not necessarily valuable) for eg I now have the remaining vase of a pair she had for many years. I broke the other playing tennis in the lounge room! No one else would understand the value if that vase but to me it is priceless 🙂

Re: What Do You Expect Your Family

**meep** — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 09:59:26 GMT

Honestly, I do not care what happens to it after I'm gone.

Re: What Do You Expect Your Family

i-once-was-bump — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 12:01:27 GMT

Goodness, my sister and I will be fighting over a mirror and neither of us want anything else.

Re: What Do You Expect Your Family

topsidesoul — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 12:08:18 GMT

Usually what happens is they fight amongst each other for them.

In my case they slide in real close while the parent is in hospital dosed with heavy painkillers and chemo drugs and bring in a dodgy laywer to sign them over as executor of the will and take almost everything.

Years later and lots of money and you end up with only their laywer brought infront of the legal board .....

I hear that happening allot, people are horrible so I will be buried with everyhting in a pyramid!

Re: What Do You Expect Your Family

the_great_she_elephant — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 12:09:07 GMT

Once I'm dead I won't know or care what anyone does with my 'treasures,' so I'm not going to waste what's left of my life stressing about it.

Re: What Do You Expect Your Family

acacia_pycnantha — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 12:16:03 GMT

All my money and goods will be left to "The Home for Traumatised Ebayers", you know, those sellers who suffer nervous breakdowns and PTSD psychosis . . . oh, and those buyers whose remorse causes them to also suffer irretreivable mental breakdown. 🙂

Maybe the "Home for Traumatised Paypallers" might get a few bucks as well.

Re: What Do You Expect Your Family

azureline** — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 12:47:47 GMT

@grandmoon wrote:
to do with your Treasures and possessions after you die??

I was asked this today by a friend who is very upset the her Son in law has told her he will send all of her to the tip.

why is she leaving it to her son in law then?

Re: What Do You Expect Your Family

spotweldersfriend — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 12:53:52 GMT

Send all of her to the tip?Oh well,at least she'll be in one piece:-)

Re: What Do You Expect Your Family

bella_again — Thu, 28 Nov 2013 12:59:33 GMT

You know I expect my family to do whatever they would want with my things. I hope that they would keep one or two things that give them positive memories about me but seriously I don't expect anyone to keep all my carp LOL!

When my MIL passed away we kept many of her things but in the end had so much we had a garage sale. It was so hard. Some stuff we sent to charity and other stuff we shared among family. Mostly we wanted to make that the things we gave away went to people who used and appreciated them and mainly that was the case. I don't think she would have wanted stuff boxed up never to see the light of day.

Of course the most important things are the memories and they will always remain in our hearts, those things can not be given away.