topic Re: Menopause .. in Community Spirit https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1243223#M329341 <DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">Menopause is that tricky “change of life” time, better known as the “sucky phase” in a woman’s life that no one ever wants to talk about. &nbsp; Sorry ladies, but menopause IS a fact of life, and how you handle it is all in the attitude.&nbsp;It’s known as “the change of life,” not the END of life, which means that it isn’t ALL bad. &nbsp;Look at it as an era of new freedom. Yes, you heard me right. There IS an upside to menopause, and I’ve come up with a list of 10 reasons why you should look forward to this challening-but-interesting time in your life.</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">&nbsp;</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">1. &nbsp;<SPAN style="text-decoration: underline;">No More Periods:</SPAN>&nbsp;&nbsp;You can swim with the sharks and not worry about becoming fish bait. You can also go camping in the mountains in Montana without fear of grizzly bears shredding your tent in search of raw meat.</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">&nbsp;</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">2. &nbsp;<SPAN style="text-decoration: underline;">Weight Gain</SPAN>: &nbsp;This can be great, but only if the extra weight is distributed in the right places. &nbsp;If it goes to the breasts, you’ve got a built-in floating device to prevent drowning in a pool. &nbsp;If it gives you a badonkadonk butt, you can sign up as a backup singer for a Beyonce music video. &nbsp;But if the excess weight settles in your stomach, you’re going to have to tell everyone it’s an inoperable food tumor that you are forced to carry for the rest of your life.</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">&nbsp;</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">3. &nbsp;<SPAN style="text-decoration: underline;">Hot Flashes</SPAN>: &nbsp;Sporting a shiny, red face and sweat rings under your arms has its advantages. &nbsp;It fools people into thinking you just had an invigorating session at the gym or in the bedroom. &nbsp;Hot flashes also keep your heating bill down in the winter and help you sweat out those extra calories from the chocolate Nutty Buddy cone you scarfed down in your car at the gas station.</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">&nbsp;</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">4. &nbsp;<SPAN style="text-decoration: underline;">Memory Loss</SPAN>: &nbsp;It’s sorta like early dementia. &nbsp;It erases all those nasty movie reels from the past that you’d rather forget. &nbsp;Like the night you puked spiked cranberry juice all over your white birthday party dress. &nbsp;Or the time your husband thought it was a good idea to clear the dance floor at your best friend’s wedding reception by doing The Worm in his tuxedo.</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">&nbsp;</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">5. &nbsp;<SPAN style="text-decoration: underline;">Loss Of Libido</SPAN>: &nbsp;You no longer have to feign headaches. &nbsp;Just remind your spouse that your lady parts are as dry as tumbleweeds rolling across Death Valley and he’ll leave you alone.</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">&nbsp;</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">6. &nbsp;<SPAN style="text-decoration: underline;">Mood Swings</SPAN>: &nbsp;You can be Freddy Krueger one minute or a Care Bear the next, and nobody will accuse you of being bipolar like they did in the car pick-up line at the elementary school when you were a hot mess mama in your thirties.</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">&nbsp;</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">7. &nbsp;<SPAN style="text-decoration: underline;">No Longer Fertile</SPAN>: &nbsp;You’ll never have to worry about birth control again. &nbsp;The money you save can then be invested in Viagra stock.</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">&nbsp;</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">8. &nbsp;<SPAN style="text-decoration: underline;">Insomnia</SPAN>: &nbsp;You get to add an extra 4 hours to your day since you’ll only be sleeping for 3. &nbsp;All those pesky items on your to-do list will be finished in no time. &nbsp;But you’re going to need some spackle in your makeup box to hide those duffel bags under your eyes.</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">&nbsp;</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">9. &nbsp;<SPAN style="text-decoration: underline;">Dry Skin</SPAN>: &nbsp;This is your excuse to go shopping and spend a fortune at the Lancome counter at the mall. &nbsp;No one wants to look at a face that resembles an elephant’s ass or a 10 year old Shar Pei.</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">&nbsp;</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">10. &nbsp;<SPAN style="text-decoration: underline;">Fatigue</SPAN>: &nbsp;Your body shifts into narcoleptic mode every day after lunch. &nbsp;To combat the fatigue, you have an excuse to invest in a gold card membership to Starbucks or convince your boss you have a medical condition that requires a midday nap on the floor under your desk. &nbsp;Be sure to carry a pillow with you at all times.</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">&nbsp;</SPAN></DIV><DIV><SPAN style="color: #000000;">Once you change your attitude, menopause isn’t all that bad. &nbsp;You just have to learn how to roll with the hot flashes, bloating and roller coaster mood swings…..and it wouldn’t hurt to have a healthy stock of wine on hand at all times, just in case…..&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; <SPAN style="color: #000000;">Marcia Kester Doyle</SPAN></SPAN></DIV> Sun, 18 May 2014 07:33:50 GMT twyngwyn 2014-05-18T07:33:50Z Menopause .. https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230655#M326648 <P>is not funny !</P><P>&nbsp;</P><P>&nbsp;</P><P><IMG src="https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/image/serverpage/image-id/36151i4C5BB3D58DA471F3/image-size/original?v=mpbl-1&amp;px=-1" align="center" border="0" title="menapause.png" alt="menapause.png" /></P> Wed, 14 May 2014 11:14:55 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230655#M326648 Anonymous 2014-05-14T11:14:55Z Re: Menopause .. https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230663#M326649 <P><IMG src="https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/image/serverpage/image-id/36153i2856910F0699EFD9/image-size/original?v=mpbl-1&amp;px=-1" align="center" border="0" title="ec22657bf1ea3b6715e0accd70ac03ab.jpg" alt="ec22657bf1ea3b6715e0accd70ac03ab.jpg" /></P> Wed, 14 May 2014 11:16:14 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230663#M326649 Anonymous 2014-05-14T11:16:14Z Re: Menopause .. https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230667#M326650 <P><IMG src="https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/image/serverpage/image-id/36155iC47BAE3B8FD6BFF3/image-size/original?v=mpbl-1&amp;px=-1" align="center" border="0" title="s-MENOPAUSE-CARTOON-large.jpg" alt="s-MENOPAUSE-CARTOON-large.jpg" /></P> Wed, 14 May 2014 11:16:53 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230667#M326650 Anonymous 2014-05-14T11:16:53Z Re: Menopause .. https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230679#M326652 <P>It is true that you don't suffer if you have babies young?</P> Wed, 14 May 2014 11:18:53 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230679#M326652 donnashuggy 2014-05-14T11:18:53Z Re: Menopause .. https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230681#M326653 <BLOCKQUOTE><HR />@Anonymous wrote:<BR /><P><IMG src="https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/image/serverpage/image-id/36153i2856910F0699EFD9/image-size/original?v=mpbl-1&amp;px=-1" align="middle" border="0" title="ec22657bf1ea3b6715e0accd70ac03ab.jpg" alt="ec22657bf1ea3b6715e0accd70ac03ab.jpg" /></P><HR /></BLOCKQUOTE><P>probably explains my current filthy mood and the nearly overwhelming desire to superglue some peoples fingers to their butts</P><P>&nbsp;</P><P><img id="smileyindifferent" class="emoticon emoticon-smileyindifferent" src="https://community.ebay.com.au/i/smilies/16x16_smiley-indifferent.png" alt="Smiley Indifferent" title="Smiley Indifferent" /></P> Wed, 14 May 2014 11:19:07 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230681#M326653 1966kelso 2014-05-14T11:19:07Z Re: Menopause .. https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230689#M326655 <P>not in my case Donna ..had first child at 17 ..</P><P>&nbsp;</P><P>and i am suffering rofl !</P> Wed, 14 May 2014 11:20:11 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230689#M326655 Anonymous 2014-05-14T11:20:11Z Re: Menopause .. https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230691#M326656 <P><IMG src="https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/image/serverpage/image-id/36157iF11A4BB164B2E972/image-size/original?v=mpbl-1&amp;px=-1" align="middle" border="0" title="dwarf" alt="dwarf" /></P> Wed, 14 May 2014 11:20:13 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230691#M326656 1966kelso 2014-05-14T11:20:13Z Re: Menopause .. https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230693#M326657 <BLOCKQUOTE><HR /><a href="https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/user/viewprofilepage/user-id/804865">@1966kelso</a> wrote:<BR /><BLOCKQUOTE><HR />@Anonymous wrote:<BR /><P><IMG src="https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/image/serverpage/image-id/36153i2856910F0699EFD9/image-size/original?v=mpbl-1&amp;px=-1" align="middle" border="0" title="ec22657bf1ea3b6715e0accd70ac03ab.jpg" alt="ec22657bf1ea3b6715e0accd70ac03ab.jpg" /></P><HR /></BLOCKQUOTE><P>probably explains my current filthy mood and the nearly overwhelming desire to superglue some peoples fingers to their butts</P><P>&nbsp;</P><P><img id="smileyindifferent" class="emoticon emoticon-smileyindifferent" src="https://community.ebay.com.au/i/smilies/16x16_smiley-indifferent.png" alt="Smiley Indifferent" title="Smiley Indifferent" /></P><P>&nbsp;</P><P>&nbsp;</P><P>yes yes ..i can relate &nbsp;to that !!</P><HR /></BLOCKQUOTE><P>&nbsp;</P> Wed, 14 May 2014 11:21:06 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230693#M326657 Anonymous 2014-05-14T11:21:06Z Re: Menopause .. https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230697#M326659 <P>Annie I have it on good authority that there is relief from that ailment............its called an enthusiastic and active toy-boy <span class="lia-unicode-emoji" title=":winking_face:">😉</span></P><P>&nbsp;</P> Wed, 14 May 2014 11:21:38 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230697#M326659 poddster 2014-05-14T11:21:38Z Re: Menopause .. https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230707#M326661 <P><IMG src="https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/image/serverpage/image-id/36159iE7692BFEAED4485C/image-size/original?v=mpbl-1&amp;px=-1" align="center" border="0" title="minnie-p-cartoon.jpg" alt="minnie-p-cartoon.jpg" /></P> Wed, 14 May 2014 11:22:10 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230707#M326661 Anonymous 2014-05-14T11:22:10Z Re: Menopause .. https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230717#M326665 <BLOCKQUOTE><HR /><a href="https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/user/viewprofilepage/user-id/437353">@poddster</a> wrote:<BR /><P>Annie I have it on good authority that there is relief from that ailment............its called an enthusiastic and active toy-boy <span class="lia-unicode-emoji" title=":winking_face:">😉</span></P><P>&nbsp;</P><HR /></BLOCKQUOTE><P>belt up poddy</P><P>&nbsp;</P><P>i am not in the mood !!</P><P>&nbsp;</P><P><IMG src="https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/image/serverpage/image-id/1302iCF6EF8D5EF545187/image-size/original?v=mpbl-1&amp;px=-1" align="center" border="0" title="emoticon-cartoon-022.gif" alt="emoticon-cartoon-022.gif" /></P> Wed, 14 May 2014 11:23:28 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230717#M326665 Anonymous 2014-05-14T11:23:28Z Re: Menopause .. https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230719#M326666 <P>&nbsp;</P><P>&nbsp;<A href="http://www.google.com.au/url?sa=i&amp;rct=j&amp;q=&amp;esrc=s&amp;source=images&amp;cd=&amp;cad=rja&amp;uact=8&amp;docid=xOuU-fPz-_JZEM&amp;tbnid=LWC1nQ-XS9HduM:&amp;ved=0CAUQjRw&amp;url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.pinterest.com%2Fhshannonc%2Fmoody-moods%2F&amp;ei=xFFzU82vEITUkQWB94GABA&amp;bvm=bv.66699033,d.dGI&amp;psig=AFQjCNFStjkcKuX8l1imBdbPJ0LFCBnWkQ&amp;ust=1400152878549005" target="_blank"><IMG src="http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/236x/35/99/f0/3599f0a5afd66651ebd30f6f85d651ea.jpg" border="0" height="165" width="236" /></A></P> Wed, 14 May 2014 11:23:38 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230719#M326666 imastawka 2014-05-14T11:23:38Z Re: Menopause .. https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230727#M326668 <P><IMG src="https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/image/serverpage/image-id/36165i61EE15F84FDD528D/image-size/original?v=mpbl-1&amp;px=-1" align="center" border="0" title="fgvybtv.png" alt="fgvybtv.png" /></P> Wed, 14 May 2014 11:25:53 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230727#M326668 Anonymous 2014-05-14T11:25:53Z Re: Menopause .. https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230731#M326669 <P><IMG src="https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/image/serverpage/image-id/36167i7DD4D8636E71C3C0/image-size/original?v=mpbl-1&amp;px=-1" align="middle" border="0" title="images.jpg" alt="images.jpg" /></P> Wed, 14 May 2014 11:26:44 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230731#M326669 twyngwyn 2014-05-14T11:26:44Z Re: Menopause .. https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230737#M326670 <P>the menopause fairy has lost my address *sigh*&nbsp;</P> Wed, 14 May 2014 11:27:44 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230737#M326670 *pepe 2014-05-14T11:27:44Z Re: Menopause .. https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230741#M326671 <P><IMG src="https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/image/serverpage/image-id/36169iEC3C1CF9B5466777/image-size/original?v=mpbl-1&amp;px=-1" align="middle" border="0" title="men" alt="men" /></P> Wed, 14 May 2014 11:27:56 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230741#M326671 1966kelso 2014-05-14T11:27:56Z Re: Menopause .. https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230747#M326673 <P>&nbsp;</P><P>&nbsp;<IMG border="0" src="https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRlFL34ZR4aEc0x4QZBg5perc6_AIq6MRmJQyzVI7rFrhXXe5MY" /></P> Wed, 14 May 2014 11:29:16 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230747#M326673 imastawka 2014-05-14T11:29:16Z Re: Menopause .. https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230769#M326678 <P><IMG src="https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/image/serverpage/image-id/36171i1BA70D38AA439C3C/image-size/original?v=mpbl-1&amp;px=-1" align="center" border="0" title="images2UMJSPGZ.jpg" alt="images2UMJSPGZ.jpg" /></P> Wed, 14 May 2014 11:33:52 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230769#M326678 Anonymous 2014-05-14T11:33:52Z Re: Menopause .. https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230771#M326679 <P>If you play your cards right you could get that warm fluttery feeling............and go into spontaneous combustion <span class="lia-unicode-emoji" title=":slightly_smiling_face:">🙂</span></P><P>&nbsp;</P><P>Just like the Phoenix, and get reborn anew from your ashes <span class="lia-unicode-emoji" title=":slightly_smiling_face:">🙂</span></P> Wed, 14 May 2014 11:35:05 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230771#M326679 poddster 2014-05-14T11:35:05Z Re: Menopause .. https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230777#M326681 <P><IMG src="https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/image/serverpage/image-id/36173i7B21F62D4FA2E3CE/image-size/medium?v=mpbl-1&amp;px=-1" align="middle" border="0" title="frank.jpg" alt="frank.jpg" /></P> Wed, 14 May 2014 11:34:45 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Menopause/m-p/1230777#M326681 flashie* 2014-05-14T11:34:45Z