topic Re: Who Should Pay in Community Spirit

Who Should Pay

grandmoon — Mon, 08 Sep 2014 03:44:13 GMT

Granddaughter's Ex want their son to go to the most expensive Catholic College in the area. He said as he is paying child support she should pay the school fees. She has offered to sent the boy to the local Catholic school and they both pay half of the fees. But if he wants the boy to go to the college he should pay all expenses over and above those of the public school. The Ex didn't go to a private school, he went to the local public school as did the Mother.

Re: Who Should Pay

cherry*135 — Mon, 08 Sep 2014 03:46:17 GMT

The boy's mother is not obligated in any way to send her son to a private college and pay the fees.

Re: Who Should Pay

azureline** — Mon, 08 Sep 2014 03:46:41 GMT

They should come to an agreement about which school is best for the child and pay half each.

Re: Who Should Pay

channys_mum — Mon, 08 Sep 2014 03:49:32 GMT

Ex is trying to stitch her up financially. Gosh they are little gems aren't they.

Your granddaughter is obliged to educate her son. There is nothing in the rule book that says at the most expensive college.

If he wants to choose and not compromise, then he pays.

If he agrees to this, tell her to get him to pay in advance, and sign with the school that he is responsible.

Re: Who Should Pay

imastawka — Mon, 08 Sep 2014 03:50:39 GMT

That man needs to get over himself.

She is not obligated to send the boy to an expensive school.

He would need a Court Order to make her do that. A judge

would probably make him pay more child support IMO

Child Support is to feed, clothe and house the children.

And it's never enough!!

Re: Who Should Pay

siggie-reported-by-alarmists — Mon, 08 Sep 2014 03:53:11 GMT

Child support is not for school fees.

It is to pay a portion of the costs for the child to have a roof over their head, food in their stomach and clothing on their back. The father cannot dictate that the money is used for anything else. He is out of line.

If he wants the child to go to a private school...... he needs to pay himself.

Re: Who Should Pay

fourandsixpants — Mon, 08 Sep 2014 03:56:47 GMT

this arrangement could backfire in Mum's face if she is the one who is main carer and signs to agree to allow child to go to this school.....the school would obviously ask BOTH parents for fees in the end ....and whom would get hurt the most as a result, NOT the parents, the son would have to leave the school???

This is all about domination, power-mongering by Father of the Mother.....appearing to be concerned about welfare of son.

I could well be wrong. Sure, he might be the 'goodie' in the story.....then this 'goodie' Daddy should pay the high fees and stop whinging his bottom off.

God some people use and abuse their children whilst taking out there angst on the ex. Makes me fume.

Re: Who Should Pay

grandmoon — Mon, 08 Sep 2014 03:58:43 GMT

I have advised her to take it back to mediation again. The Ex is a control freak.

Re: Who Should Pay

bright.ton42 — Mon, 08 Sep 2014 08:19:38 GMT

I went to an expensive Catholic college and you should see how I turned out.

Re: Who Should Pay

boris1gary — Mon, 08 Sep 2014 08:49:10 GMT

Wouldn't be sending child to any private school, wouldn't happen and couldn't be forced or paid into agreeing to it.

Re: Who Should Pay

imastawka — Mon, 08 Sep 2014 09:12:48 GMT

Yeah or cajoled, you forgot cajoled into it.

None of this mediation stuff. Flat out - nope

Re: Who Should Pay

boris1gary — Mon, 08 Sep 2014 09:56:12 GMT

@imastawka wrote:
Yeah or cajoled, you forgot cajoled into it.

None of this mediation stuff. Flat out - nope

haha cajoled, that didn't enter my head because as soon as I thought about it, my cranky pants were on.

Re: Who Should Pay

azureline** — Mon, 08 Sep 2014 10:26:23 GMT

I am obviously alone with my line of thinking...................... I think the parents need to address the reason the dad wants to send his child to that school. If it is the best place for the child, both parents should pay.

Re: Who Should Pay

softail-joanie — Mon, 08 Sep 2014 22:10:10 GMT

Granddaughter's Ex want their son to go to the most expensive Catholic College in the area.

What does the son want?

He said as he is paying child support she should pay the school fees.

Does the amount of what he does pay cover the child's support, with enough left over to cover this school he wants to send their son to?

She has offered to sent the boy to the local Catholic school and they both pay half of the fees.

Again, what does the boy want? You say college, I'm assuming he is of age to decide for himself.

But if he wants the boy to go to the college he should pay all expenses over and above those of the public school.

I'd say if the student in question wants to go to a certain school bad enough, he should take what the mother, and father are willing to pay, whatever that might be, and pay the remaining costs himself. If he can't do that, well, it falls back on a quote by the Rolling Stones "You can't always get what you want"

Re: Who Should Pay

azureline** — Mon, 08 Sep 2014 22:19:11 GMT

College here can mean as young as 5 yo.

Re: Who Should Pay

bushies.girl — Mon, 08 Sep 2014 22:40:00 GMT

Personally, I wouldn't have my children in or around ANY Catholic school, far too risky

Re: Who Should Pay

siggie-reported-by-alarmists — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 04:08:52 GMT

The child should be kept out of adult decisions. He should not even be aware the parents are discussing this.

The father needs to be educated on what child support payments are for......

Re: Who Should Pay

azureline** — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 04:34:52 GMT

@siggie-reported-by-alarmists wrote:
The child should be kept out of adult decisions. He should not even be aware the parents are discussing this.

The father needs to be educated on what child support payments are for......

I agree......

however, which school would they have sent him to if they were still together?

Re: Who Should Pay

cherry*135 — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 04:41:54 GMT

IF they were still together they would have one household, one household's expenses (possibly a 2 income household).

Does the mother have enough income to pay 1/2 of private school fees? That is the crux of the matter, whether she agrees to child going to private school or not...if it would be impossible or a financial burden on her, why should the father impose that on her?

Or if she simply believes public education is just as good as private, then she shouldn't be forced into changing her view on that.

Re: Who Should Pay

siggie-reported-by-alarmists — Tue, 09 Sep 2014 04:38:51 GMT

@azureline** wrote:
@siggie-reported-by-alarmists wrote:
The child should be kept out of adult decisions. He should not even be aware the parents are discussing this.

The father needs to be educated on what child support payments are for......
I agree......
however, which school would they have sent him to if they were still together?

They.... are not together.....completely irrelevant.