https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/2185494#M659621 "This Brochure is a gem!<BR /><BR />A friend went to Beijing recently and was given this brochure by the hotel. It is precious. She is keeping it and reading it whenever she feels depressed. Obviously, it has been translated directly, word for word from Mandarin to English……….<BR /><BR />Getting There:<BR />Our representative will make you wait at the airport.. The bus to the hotel runs along the lake shore. Soon you will feel pleasure in passing water. You will know that you are getting near the hotel, because you will go round the bend. The manager will await you in the entrance hall. He always tries to have intercourse with all new guests.<BR /><BR />The hotel:<BR />This is a family hotel, so children are very welcome. We of course are always pleased to accept adultery. Highly skilled nurses are available in the evenings to put down your children. Guests are invited to conjugate in the bar and expose themselves to others. But please note that ladies are not allowed to have babies in the bar. We organize social games, so no guest is ever left alone to play with them self.<BR /><BR />The Restaurant:<BR />Our menus have been carefully chosen to be ordinary and unexciting. At dinner, our quartet will circulate from table to table, and fiddle with you.<BR /><BR />Your Room:<BR />Every room has excellent facilities for your private parts. In winter, every room is on heat. Each room has a balcony offering views of outstanding obscenity! . You will not be disturbed by traffic noise, since the road between the hotel and the lake is used only by pederasts.<BR /><BR />Bed<BR />Your bed has been made in accordance with local tradition. If you have any other ideas please ring for the chambermaid. Please take advantage of her. She will be very pleased to squash your shirts, blouses and underwear. If asked, she will also squeeze your trousers.<BR /><BR />Above all:<BR />When you leave us at the end of your holiday, you will have no hope. You will struggle to forget it." Sat, 15 Sep 2018 01:01:44 GMT tommy.irene 2018-09-15T01:01:44Z https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1518#M256 Hi everyone ..top o the morning to ye..just passing by..though I would call in to see you Sat, 11 Apr 2009 09:38:04 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1518#M256 tommy.irene 2009-04-11T09:38:04Z https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1524#M257 Welcome and please enjoy your stay Sat, 11 Apr 2009 09:38:50 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1524#M257 tattsariffic 2009-04-11T09:38:50Z https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1528#M258 Are you married? If not are you looking for an eas enty into Oz? Is so, my hand is up! But you would have to talk a lot. Sat, 11 Apr 2009 09:40:26 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1528#M258 shhh_its_me 2009-04-11T09:40:26Z https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1532#M259 Welcome. Sat, 11 Apr 2009 09:41:43 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1532#M259 thebraff 2009-04-11T09:41:43Z https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1536#M260 Hello there!!<BR /> <BR /> <BR /> Beware of the Gurriers <span class="lia-unicode-emoji" title=":winking_face:">😉</span> Sat, 11 Apr 2009 09:42:22 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1536#M260 night.wol 2009-04-11T09:42:22Z https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1539#M261 welcome to down under <span class="lia-unicode-emoji" title=":winking_face:">😉</span><BR /> begger off shhh, hes mine X-( or are you a she <span class="lia-unicode-emoji" title=":face_with_open_mouth:">😮</span><BR /> :^O Sat, 11 Apr 2009 09:43:43 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1539#M261 doll*obsession 2009-04-11T09:43:43Z https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1542#M262 &gt; Are you married? If not are you looking for an eas enty into Oz? Is so, my hand is up! But you would have to talk a lot.<BR /> Yes im married and im 70years old Sat, 11 Apr 2009 09:44:20 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1542#M262 tommy.irene 2009-04-11T09:44:20Z https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1544#M263 Nuh uh... look woman you are already taken plus I put my hand up first! Sat, 11 Apr 2009 09:45:34 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1544#M263 shhh_its_me 2009-04-11T09:45:34Z https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1547#M264 If you are a good looking woman under 80 Sssshhh and Doll then you ae in with a chance. :^O Sat, 11 Apr 2009 09:45:55 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1547#M264 thebraff 2009-04-11T09:45:55Z https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1550#M265 lol that stopped them real quick lol Sat, 11 Apr 2009 09:45:55 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1550#M265 tattsariffic 2009-04-11T09:45:55Z https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1553#M266 Ahhh bugger.... you got a grandson?? *hopeful looking* (learnt it off patkin) Sat, 11 Apr 2009 09:46:41 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1553#M266 shhh_its_me 2009-04-11T09:46:41Z https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1557#M267 Hi Tommy<BR /> <BR /> it's night time here Sat, 11 Apr 2009 09:47:23 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1557#M267 Anonymous 2009-04-11T09:47:23Z https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1560#M268 :^O The braff and tatts. Sat, 11 Apr 2009 09:47:26 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1560#M268 shhh_its_me 2009-04-11T09:47:26Z https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1564#M269 Have to go back to UK my breakfast is on table ..Happy Easter..see you all later Sat, 11 Apr 2009 09:48:50 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1564#M269 tommy.irene 2009-04-11T09:48:50Z https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1568#M270 &gt; :^O The braff and tatts.<BR /> Why you laughing at me? I just said welcome lol Sat, 11 Apr 2009 09:50:41 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1568#M270 tattsariffic 2009-04-11T09:50:41Z https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1571#M271 &gt; Nuh uh... look woman you are already taken plus I put my hand up first!<BR /> <BR /> <BR /> Darn! pesky husband gets in the way again *sulks* Sat, 11 Apr 2009 09:52:13 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1571#M271 doll*obsession 2009-04-11T09:52:13Z https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1574#M272 LOL!!....I think you all managed to scare the nice Irishman away!!:^O Sat, 11 Apr 2009 09:54:50 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1574#M272 vintage-star 2009-04-11T09:54:50Z https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1578#M273 lol<BR /> <BR /> Happy Easter Tommy to you too come back soon Sat, 11 Apr 2009 10:00:03 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1578#M273 Anonymous 2009-04-11T10:00:03Z https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1580#M274 HI everyone thanks for answerning my thread.....are you short of men..might send some mates for you Sat, 11 Apr 2009 10:59:07 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1580#M274 tommy.irene 2009-04-11T10:59:07Z https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1584#M275 lol Please do!! Not for doll tho... she is taken plus I had my hand up first!! Sat, 11 Apr 2009 11:06:04 GMT https://community.ebay.com.au/t5/Community-Spirit/Visiting-Irishman-From-UK/m-p/1584#M275 shhh_its_me 2009-04-11T11:06:04Z