topic Wedding Etiquette in Community Spirit

Wedding Etiquette

chinchuckchick — Sat, 26 Jan 2013 12:47:30 GMT

Haven't been to a wedding for a few years (all our friends are married/not getting married/divorced etc) recieved one yesterday for the daughter of friends.

Anyway, is it usual these days to put BSB/Account details on the card that says there will be a wishing well?

Fair enough (much as I dislike the lack of personal touch in a money gift) I've gotten used to wishing wells, especially for couples who have been together for a long time, I don't even mind putting money toward their honeymoon, but to turn it into a bank transaction goes too far for me.

Re: Wedding Etiquette

the_bob_delusion — Sat, 26 Jan 2013 12:49:57 GMT

that's original.

Re: Wedding Etiquette

poison_ivys_pen — Sat, 26 Jan 2013 12:50:23 GMT

Can't say I've ever heard of it but to be honest I'd decline to do so and just give the physical money.

Re: Wedding Etiquette

chinchuckchick — Sat, 26 Jan 2013 12:57:30 GMT

I've never seen it before either, just came across as a little "in your face"

At least there wasn'tone of those carpy poems about the wishing well I guess.

Bonus is if you forget to go to the atm before the wedding you could just do an online transfer I guess.

Re: Wedding Etiquette

**meep** — Sat, 26 Jan 2013 13:01:53 GMT

😮 No, and i have been to a couple of weddings recently.

hmm.....well......after the initial reaction, now i think that it would be convenient! Just do an online bank transfer and its done! yes, why not.....They would need to have online banking though, i would not want to go into a bank to make a deposit. I think PayPal is the way to go.

Re: Wedding Etiquette

**meep** — Sat, 26 Jan 2013 13:08:15 GMT

Ha! After a quick google, it appears that it is actually not that uncommon. If you are going to give money, does it really matter if its cash or a bank deposit?

Re: Wedding Etiquette

**meep** — Sat, 26 Jan 2013 13:12:12 GMT

I suppose you could use Best Wishes as the transaction reference....Would you bother with a card?

Re: Wedding Etiquette

lis351 — Sat, 26 Jan 2013 13:29:20 GMT

TBH I think it's tacky. Or maybe it's just technologically sound and I'm behind. Dunno, but I don't like it. I'm going to 2 weddings next month, one of them Hubs doesn't even want to give them money, just a card, been together 20 years and quite well off.

I don't think I would be doin the bank transfer thing.

Re: Wedding Etiquette

the*scarlet*pimpernel — Sat, 26 Jan 2013 13:38:08 GMT

give them a toaster ]:)

Re: Wedding Etiquette

chinchuckchick — Sat, 26 Jan 2013 13:44:55 GMT

give them a toaster

Haha, went to a wedding a few years ago and did just that, put the Bunnings vouchers inside.

The friends who got married rand us the next day to say how funny they thought it was and i had to tell them to check inside the toaster for the giftcards

Re: Wedding Etiquette

lis351 — Sat, 26 Jan 2013 13:45:06 GMT

:^O

Re: Wedding Etiquette

chinchuckchick — Sat, 26 Jan 2013 13:50:12 GMT

I was so glad they rang lis, I coould imagine them them throwing it in the shed for the five years, it was one of those el cheapo toasters from kmart. They hadn't even taken it out of the box when they called., they had put no gifts on the invite, so thought we were just taking the p

Re: Wedding Etiquette

i-need-a-martini — Sat, 26 Jan 2013 21:59:52 GMT

The BSB account thing is quite common now.

Personally I hate to give money for a wedding and the BSB thing makes it even worse. I refuse and always buy a gift.

Re: Wedding Etiquette

azureline** — Sat, 26 Jan 2013 22:09:00 GMT

I don't like it but then, the generations before me were horrified at invitations that asked for money in lieu of gifts.

I am horrified by people who think it's ok to ask for money instead of gifts for children's birthdays now....... because they have everything already?

I think it is rude.

Re: Wedding Etiquette

lurker17260 — Sat, 26 Jan 2013 22:28:38 GMT

My first thought was that's horrible, but when I think about it ........ a wedding we went to recently suggested money in lieu of a gift. They were then left at the end of the night with a LARGE amount of cash they had to secure until Monday morning. So maybe a deposit is safer?

Re: Wedding Etiquette

tulip*place — Sat, 26 Jan 2013 23:02:17 GMT

BSB number for wedding gifts, hope they include the reference number so the giver can be identified. Nothing worse then money being deposited and you have no idea who it is from.

Years ago when I got married, I requested money instead of gifts.. my lovely aunt had issues with the food and deducted half of the original amount in the card.. Real classy broad had written in the corner of the card the amount then tried to smudge it out...

Re: Wedding Etiquette

jean2579 — Sun, 27 Jan 2013 01:25:33 GMT

My DIL's family are originally from Singapore and at their Wedding small red envelopes were placed beside each plate. As the Bride and Groom visited each table after the meal anyone who had chosen to give money discretely handed the red envelope to them. They did not know afterwards who had gifted money or how much. Everyone received the same warm thank you note later. It was a lovely way to gift money.

Re: Wedding Etiquette

monman12 — Sun, 27 Jan 2013 01:31:29 GMT

One of my sons decided to marry his partner of 18 years last Xmas, in Port Douglas, on Christmas Eve. I was disconcerted to say the least (distance from Melbourne, timing, animals etc) but thoroughly enjoyed Port Douglas, the little historic weatherboard chapel in Anzac Park, the Saturday market, and everything else.

Drank too much, ate too much, lazed too much, oh yes and having rejected the idea of an electronic money transfer, gave the couple my personal cheque, together with a permanent reminder of the event in the form of one of my antique clocks.

Will visit Port Douglas again, it is so friendly and pleasant.

Re: Wedding Etiquette

jean2579 — Sun, 27 Jan 2013 01:34:51 GMT

You're a sweetie monman!

Re: Wedding Etiquette

patchoo78 — Sun, 27 Jan 2013 01:36:33 GMT

They would need to have online banking though, i would not want to go into a bank to make a deposit

No they don't.. I've transferred money using online banking into a friends account and they didn't have it..