Re: How would you have handled this

jean2579 · ‎22-08-2013

Today I let down both my DIL and Grand daughter . At my craft meeting some one made some thoughtless remarks about Asian people. My DIL is of Asian origin. I did not object or tell that they were way out of line. Quite simply I did nothing when I should have jumped up and down. I feel that I was more concerned about the feelings of those present than what was said. How would you have handled it?

twinkles**stars · ‎22-08-2013

There was no need need to jump and down 🙂

I would have simply said I disagreed and racial comments did not belong at a craft meet (or anywhere else for that matter)

You didn't let anyone down at all....the person making the comments did

kyliecrv · ‎22-08-2013

Jean, don't beat yourself up hunni.
It's their problem not yours and you are not responsible for reprimanding others for racial behaviour.

❤️

kyliecrv · ‎22-08-2013

Doesn't mean you think less if your DIL & grandchild in my opinion. X

**meep** · ‎22-08-2013

I completely understand that you chose to avoid confrontation. It does not mean that you condone racist attitudes.

Don't feel bad. Put it behind you.

crystal**flake · ‎22-08-2013

I would have smiled and said, my daughter inlaw is from...................... .

kengillard · ‎22-08-2013

totally agree with all the above Jean

azureline** · ‎22-08-2013

I probably would not have been as refined as you but you know there was nothing you could have said that would change their opinions.

🙂

polksaladallie · ‎22-08-2013

I would say, " beg your pardon? ", and if they repeat it, say again, " beg you pardon? ", and again and again. It will not be too long before the person hesitates and realises what they are saying and either mumbles in embarrassment or apologises for what they have said.

I read that tip some years ago and have done it once myself.

What the others in the room think is irrelevant.

annies_fancy_dress · ‎22-08-2013

I think you did the right thing by not making a scene.

BUT, I would spend the next week working out a way of praising my DIL and expressing love for my granddaughter during the next class.

I assume the rude person will then feel belated "foot in mouth" syndrome.

Maintaining your dignity is always the best behaviour.

Also, that person may be rude and bigotted, but they weren't attacking your family personally.