How to wear an Akubra -

Put it on your head.

🙂

Apparently it's a cat toy

No, Stawks, it's a large flightless bird. It would be cruel to introduce it to your cat as a toy.

😜

       Now I've gotta dry my socks

I'll soon make short work of that fancy toy!!

Or I'll jump in the air and run away from it, hey, who's to know?!!

Who's that tapping on the back door?

Mother magpie - "I can see the food... Don't make me use my Jedi mind powers to open the door...".

I opened the door and she said "Wow, the Force really does have power over weak minds, heh heh...".

Have I said she's a character? Ha ha.

I put the food out on the table and when she came back I noticed a large, sleek, black figure waiting patiently on next door's roof.

She left, and the crow came down, picked up a chunky piece of crust, and hopped up onto the arch, with that.

While he was eating she came back, grabbed some more food, and left without a peep.

They can "play nicely" together, when they want.

When they want... Ha ha.

Now that's what I would call someone who has a wise head!!