"The effect mum's accident has had on you and your sister isn't even on his radar. "

Thats exactly right.

On the phone, when i said "Dad, you have to realise that I am grieving as well. I lost a mother"

He yelled down the phone "WELL I LOST A WIFE"

He yelled "How dare you talk to me like this. You are a child"

I said "No dad, i am your 38 year old daughter with children. Your grandchildren. And you are pushing us all away".

He replied "I dont care. You dont know what im going through."

And i said "And you never acknowledge what I am going through. I may not be there, but that doesnt mean i am not devistated. Anyway this isnt about that. I just want you to think about us here. Me, your grandkids. Maybe call now and then to see how we are or ask what we are up to. Or listen if i try to tell you something. Instead of only calling if you need to me to pay for your ebay purchases"

That made him crazy and he said some really hurtful things and then said "If you keep talking to me like this im going to hang up"

And i said "Fine. Do that if thats what you want"

And he did