Thanks again to everyone for the comments.

The basic issue is that the buyer didn't read the listing properly before purchase particularly relating to the shipping, which surpries nobody of course, and then goes on to compound the problem by not communicating.

I'll try eBay again as cathyjoyjoy has suggested and unless they can give me a definitive course of action I will give the buyer until tonight to respond before doing anything as it was after hours when the purchase was made yesterday. I also have a phone number but I'm reluctant at this point to move outside the eBay message system.

Whatever happens I suspect I'll be wearing some sort of negative.