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@banter0416 wrote:

The items don't add up to a lot - 2% of the total order this time, but she is stealing from me regardless. I am struggling with the morality and don't know what to say to her. Do I insist that the items were packed and not refund her therefore possibly losing her as a customer - I don't want to lose her as a customer but can I/should I allow this to continue? Next time it might be for a much larger amount. What to say to her?

 

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I want to address this specifically, and separately, and this is just a personal opinion so I'm not telling you what to think or say about this situation, just sharing what I think.... 🙂

I've been selling on eBay seriously for about 5 years now. When I started, I did a lot of things, and compromised a lot, out of "customer care", but over time I realised that it was to my own detriment and I was allowing people to take advantage of me - now, I would rather lose business than accept customers who have no respect for me, and I don't care how much they have spent in the past. 

I have a right to be treated fairly, and I firmly believe that each party to a transaction deserves just as much respect as the other. If a buyer lies to me for their own personal gain, how much that gain is to them (or how much the loss is to me) is completely irrelevant, the only thing that matters is that they're the kind of person who thinks it's ok to lie and steal, and who knows how that will escalate over time. 

I have no tolerance at all for people who lie to me and steal from me - they are not customers, they are theives. It doesn't matter to me if they stole 2% or 100% of the order, I will not deal with such a person ever again. 

Consider not only the immediate finiancial loss of refunding ot replacing the missing items, but the time spent on all the follow-up organising replacements or refunds etc, you'll probably find that once everything is taken into consideration, the losses are a bit higher than 2%.