So after doing it for 13 years I have been doing it wrong?

49 fb as a seller in 13 years is hardly experienced IMO

You need to stop selling o'seas if you can't figure it out

I also noticed a fb that said the APost tracking didn't work

If you just drop them in the red box,  that's not tracking.

They need to be lodged over the counter.

So many rules have been implemented in those 13 years,

You need to read up on them apparently

I'll repeat what others have said - no scam here