@Sellers: When is it okay to request a refund? (etiquette, not rules)

[nevanevame]

I purchased a lot of 20 pieces of an item, and one of them was damaged. I initiated a return, sent photos, and stated very clearly that only one of the 20 pieces was defective. I was expecting to be offered a partial refund, but the seller just gave me a full refund without discussing it. Now, I feel bad for complaining, and I'm wondering if my "complain about everything" policy is the right way to behave. I know about the rules that are written, but I want to know about the unwritten rules; what does a good buyer look like?

I always complain if there is something wrong with the item I received, for 2 reasons.

1. If there is something wrong with SOME of your stock, perhaps I can draw your attention to it; perhaps you don't send faulty stuff to other people, so it reduces the risk of future complaints and bad feedback.

2. Some ebay sellers are fantastic, and others are absolute crooks, and the only way buyers can tell the difference is to look at feedback ratings. I want to do everything in my power to give good sellers an advantage, by giving the right feedback for everyone, but also, I buy so much **bleep**, leaving feedback is the only way I can keep track of what has arrived and what still needs my attention. I understand that neutral feedback is negative feedback, so when in doubt, I give full positive feedback, but if there is a problem with the item, I want to see how you handle the issue before I tell other sellers that you're fantastic. If the issue is small, and the seller agrees to take responsibility, maybe I will just close the case, because I don't really care about the problem; I just want to know that they are reasonable before I give positive feedback. 

I know eBay will take my side most of the time, so I am the only person who will stop me from treating sellers badly. I want to do the right thing, but I don't have access to a neutral perspective, so sometimes it's hard to say what is fair. This situation has made me question my "always complain" policy, so I am looking for feedback from sellers. Am I a bad buyer? Help me become better. What should I do if I am unhappy with my purchase, but the issue is small?

[davewil1964]

I purchased a lot of 20 pieces of an item, and one of them was damaged. I initiated a return, sent photos, and stated very clearly that only one of the 20 pieces was defective. 

Why did you initiate a return? You obviously didn't want to return all 20. Did you contact the seller first, or just go straight for the jugular? eBay is binary - good or not - not a curate's egg, so there is no facility to partially refund against a return request. Unless the seller and buyer negotiate it, and the seller has confidence the buyer will honour their word and cancel the request after the partial refund is done. This seller obviously wasn't confident you would do the right thing, probably because of the way you went about things.

The good news is that you are unlikely ever to be able to purchase from that seller again. And doubtless quite a few others who visit the boards and read this. "Complaining about everything" is not going to enamour you to many sellers.

[beerandpizzaplz]

Yes you should complain if something is wrong!

Hard to say from here if it was the sellers fault - was the issue something that could have been easily missed?

It does sound like you have opened a 'significantly not as described' case when you say you initiated a return. - something like that is difficult for a seller to argue against - they may have just to decided to refund and save themselves the stress of the backward and forward thing untill they had to refund anyway..

You do have the option of sending money thru paypal directly to the seller.

I would think 95% of the purchase price would be an appropriate sum in the instance of one in twenty items being dodgy?

Unless you have already returned the items?

[go-tazz · Accepted solution]

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@nevanevame wrote:

I purchased a lot of 20 pieces of an item, and one of them was damaged. I initiated a return, sent photos, and stated very clearly that only one of the 20 pieces was defective. I was expecting to be offered a partial refund, but the seller just gave me a full refund without discussing it.

That's why there is a link to Contact the seller so that you can let them know that there was a problem and

it gives them the oppertunity sort/fix it,(in the case the could have asked you if you wanted a partial refund

for the dameged item).

Once you initiate a refund non of that can apply and the seller can only give a full refund.

Now, I feel bad for complaining, and I'm wondering if my "complain about everything" policy is the right way to behave. I know about the rules that are written, but I want to know about the unwritten rules; what does a good buyer look like?

I have a lot of buyers blocked that have a number of feedback ratings stating that they received a refund

as there are to many buyers now using eBay as a free shopping site.

I always complain if there is something wrong with the item I received, for 2 reasons.

1. If there is something wrong with SOME of your stock, perhaps I can draw your attention to it; perhaps you don't send faulty stuff to other people, so it reduces the risk of future complaints and bad feedback.

Then contact the seller so that they can try and sort something out,(the dispute system is there for if you

can't sort it out).

2. Some ebay sellers are fantastic, and others are absolute crooks, and the only way buyers can tell the difference is to look at feedback ratings. I want to do everything in my power to give good sellers an advantage, by giving the right feedback for everyone, but also, I buy so much **bleep**, leaving feedback is the only way I can keep track of what has arrived and what still needs my attention. I understand that neutral feedback is negative feedback, so when in doubt, I give full positive feedback, but if there is a problem with the item, I want to see how you handle the issue before I tell other sellers that you're fantastic. If the issue is small, and the seller agrees to take responsibility, maybe I will just close the case, because I don't really care about the problem; I just want to know that they are reasonable before I give positive feedback. 

When you open a dispute/case the seller has only one option and they see that as a full negative on

your part,(you give them only one option which is a full refund).

Do you also mark the stars down if the postage cost is to high in your opinion and mark the postage delivery

star down because the postage service takes their time getting it to do?

I know eBay will take my side most of the time, so I am the only person who will stop me from treating sellers badly. I want to do the right thing, but I don't have access to a neutral perspective, so sometimes it's hard to say what is fair. This situation has made me question my "always complain" policy, so I am looking for feedback from sellers. Am I a bad buyer? Help me become better. What should I do if I am unhappy with my purchase, but the issue is small?

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That's the problem,eBay do take the buyers side to often and to quickly when it could've been easily sorted if

the buyer contacted the seller INSTEAD of using the dispute/abuse system.

In the future please contact the seller first and give them a chance,

[springyzone]

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@nevanevame wrote:

I purchased a lot of 20 pieces of an item, and one of them was damaged. I initiated a return, sent photos, and stated very clearly that only one of the 20 pieces was defective. I was expecting to be offered a partial refund, but the seller just gave me a full refund without discussing it. Now, I feel bad for complaining, and I'm wondering if my "complain about everything" policy is the right way to behave. I know about the rules that are written, but I want to know about the unwritten rules; what does a good buyer look like?

I always complain if there is something wrong with the item I received, for 2 reasons.

1. If there is something wrong with SOME of your stock, perhaps I can draw your attention to it; perhaps you don't send faulty stuff to other people, so it reduces the risk of future complaints and bad feedback.

2. Some ebay sellers are fantastic, and others are absolute crooks, and the only way buyers can tell the difference is to look at feedback ratings. I want to do everything in my power to give good sellers an advantage, by giving the right feedback for everyone, but also, I buy so much **bleep**, leaving feedback is the only way I can keep track of what has arrived and what still needs my attention. I understand that neutral feedback is negative feedback, so when in doubt, I give full positive feedback, but if there is a problem with the item, I want to see how you handle the issue before I tell other sellers that you're fantastic. If the issue is small, and the seller agrees to take responsibility, maybe I will just close the case, because I don't really care about the problem; I just want to know that they are reasonable before I give positive feedback. 

I know eBay will take my side most of the time, so I am the only person who will stop me from treating sellers badly. I want to do the right thing, but I don't have access to a neutral perspective, so sometimes it's hard to say what is fair. This situation has made me question my "always complain" policy, so I am looking for feedback from sellers. Am I a bad buyer? Help me become better. What should I do if I am unhappy with my purchase, but the issue is small?

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Firstly, I think every buyer has the right to let a seller know if something is wrong with a purchase.

If it is very minor, maybe you might let it pass but otherwise I am inclined to contact a seller.

Like you, it could be for a couple of reasons

-to alert them to problems in their ad or listing

-and when there is a problem, how a seller responds is important.

I wouldn't have actually opened a case against a seller over a very minor issue, I'd say the seller refunded as it was just quicker & they felt they had no alternative anyway.

Go Tazz asked.

Do you also mark the stars down if the postage cost is to high in your opinion and mark the postage delivery

star down because the postage service takes their time getting it to do?

I'd say that realistically,  many, many buyers will mark postage cost stars down if they think there is a big discrepancy between what they were charged and what it seems the seller was charged. That isn't going to change so sellers need to either offer free postage or else bump up the cost of their items a bit so it doesn't appear as if the seller is making a profit on the postage charge.

There will still be some buyers who are unfair and mark a seller down even when charged exact postage costs (we've had this happen), just because in their opinion Aust post charges too much. They're numpties, you can't do much about those ones.

The time the postal service takes is not a seller's fault but there's a grey area here. To me, the elephant in the room is when an item is posted. I recently bought 3 different items, one interstate item first, then 2 others from Vic 3 days later. All have the same arrival calculation date ie item 1 had 10 days, the other 2 have a week. Now, one of the items from Vic was posted same day & arrived a couple of days ago. The other 2 items were not posted for several days, one as late as 5 days later. It will be touch & go whether the final 2 items fact arrive by the due date range. Now i know sellers say the ebay dates are fantasies but what will a buyer think if an item is late & was not posted for 5 days after a sale? How should the stars be marked? I don't believe they should necessarily get 5 stars. If they post quickly & they get delayed in the post.. different (IMO). But the first buyer to me deserves the 5 stars for postage, the other 2, I am not so sure.

[#6]

Do you also mark the stars down if the postage cost is to high in your opinion and mark the postage delivery

star down because the postage service takes their time getting it to do?

I'd say that realistically,  many, many buyers will mark postage cost stars down if they think there is a big discrepancy between what they were charged and what it seems the seller was charged. That isn't going to change so sellers need to either offer free postage or else bump up the cost of their items a bit so it doesn't appear as if the seller is making a profit on the postage charge.

There will still be some buyers who are unfair and mark a seller down even when charged exact postage costs (we've had this happen), just because in their opinion Aust post charges too much. They're numpties, you can't do much about those ones.

The time the postal service takes is not a seller's fault but there's a grey area here. To me, the elephant in the room is when an item is posted. I recently bought 3 different items, one interstate item first, then 2 others from Vic 3 days later. All have the same arrival calculation date ie item 1 had 10 days, the other 2 have a week. Now, one of the items from Vic was posted same day & arrived a couple of days ago. The other 2 items were not posted for several days, one as late as 5 days later. It will be touch & go whether the final 2 items fact arrive by the due date range. Now i know sellers say the ebay dates are fantasies but what will a buyer think if an item is late & was not posted for 5 days after a sale? How should the stars be marked? I don't believe they should necessarily get 5 stars. If they post quickly & they get delayed in the post.. different (IMO). But the first buyer to me deserves the 5 stars for postage, the other 2, I am not so sure.

[nevanevame]

I did "contact the seller", but then eBay asks you what it's about. I don't remember whether I said I wanted to return it, or it was not as described, but both were true, so I might have picked either. I did not know that there are horrific concequences if you pick the wrong option, and in my defense, i was trying to be honest; I made the best judgement I could, based on the information I had, and I picked what I thought was an appropriate answer to the question. I made a conscious effort to be clear, right from the start, that only one of the items was faulty and I was happy with the rest; I am confident that I made that clear. I was polite. I made no demands. I did not think the seller had tried to cheat me, and I did not want to cheat him, so I was trying to sound friendly. If he assumed I was out for blood, it was not based on my message to him.

And no, I do not mark the stars down. When I give positive feedback I give full stars for everything. I only consider giving less than full stars if I give negative feedback, and I only give negative feedback if there is a serious problem; if that happens, I am still honest about what went well.

"Contact the seller" is all I was trying to do. 

I will not make this mistake again, and I appreciate your guidence.

[nevanevame]

My plan was just to buy the item again and include a note, explaining the situation and asking them not to send it, but then it occurred to me that the guy might not speak english. I was going to ask customer support for advice, but if you have any, I'll take it.

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[nevanevame]

If you, or any other seller don't want my business, that's fine by me. I don't feel entitled to your service and I wouldn't feel right forcing you into anything you're uncomfortable with, for any reason, but I don't really understand it. I'm upset enough about an unfair decision that went in my favour to come here and ask for advice, even though it was the seller that made the decision... Even if I **bleep**ed up, surely that shows that I mean well; I'm willing to own up to my mistakes, and I take the initiative to try and fix it when I have nothing to gain but my own integrity. If you would refuse to deal with me for that, you must have access to a lot of really great customers.

[go-tazz]

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@nevanevame wrote:

I did "contact the seller", but then eBay asks you what it's about. I don't remember whether I said I wanted to return it, or it was not as described, but both were true, so I might have picked either. I did not know that there are horrific concequences

That's another place where eBay goes wrong as they point buyers to a dispute.

The best option to use is the top one: I have a question about using my item or I want to send the seller a

message,(that then gives you an option to contact the seller direct).

if you pick the wrong option, and in my defense, i was trying to be honest; I made the best judgement I could, based on the information I had, and I picked what I thought was an appropriate answer to the question. I made a conscious effort to be clear, right from the start, that only one of the items was faulty and I was happy with the rest; I am confident that I made that clear. I was polite. I made no demands. I did not think the seller had tried to cheat me, and I did not want to cheat him, so I was trying to sound friendly. If he assumed I was out for blood, it was not based on my message to him.

And no, I do not mark the stars down. When I give positive feedback I give full stars for everything. I only consider giving less than full stars if I give negative feedback, and I only give negative feedback if there is a serious problem; if that happens, I am still honest about what went well.

Great,(as a number of buyers mark those stars down thinking that they are for the delivery time and the

postage costs that may seem high but is what AP charges).

Sellers do get "hammered" by eBay at times and low star ratings can affect their selling ability,

(a number of sellers can no longer sell as buyers left them low stars and/or had to many disputes against

them).

"Contact the seller" is all I was trying to do. 

I will not make this mistake again, and I appreciate your guidence.

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[*sparklz* · Accepted solution]

If you go to your paypal account the sellers paypal address will show there.

If you really feel that bad then copy the sellers paypal address and click on the pay anyone tab and send them back some money less a bit for the faulty one.