Opinion on refunds

[damsel_in_distress_au]

What's the general consensus on offering refunds for items missing in the post.  The item was posted 3 weeks ago along with approx 30 other items and one item hasn't been received.  I said that if it hadn't been received by last Friday I'd offer a refund.  I'll still stand by that, but just received a pretty harsh message from the buyer which was completely unnecessary.  

So despite the message, I'll still give the refund but what do most of you do? 

Thanks

[lane-ends]

can still leave feedback, but if you make it hard work for buyer you will substantially increase chanc eof it.