Baby Swap

[polksaladallie]

If you found out that your baby was accidentally swapped for another woman's baby in the hospital, would you want to exchange babies later?

If so, at what age?  If you found out at one month, one year, five years, ten years.  Is there a point when you would leave things as they are?  Or would you want your own flesh and blood child with you at any age?

http://www.abc.net.au/news/2015-02-11/french-families-girls-switched-birth-win-nearly-2-million-euro...

French families of babies swapped at birth win $2.7 million in compensation

[creative*crisis]

What a dilemma, I think time elapsed would be critical to your decision.

If too much time had passed as in years , I think I'd rather I didn't ever find out, because you can't unlove the child you've got but you wouldn't be able to forget about your natural child.

All in all after a long time lapse I think i might leave things as they are if I could  have an option to also get to know my birth child.

[azureline**]

 I am not sure I could say, unless it actually happened, I would want both, I think?

My youngest son was swapped in the nursery (in the days of hospital nurseries)....... I told them the baby in the cot they brought me for feeding was not mine, they laughed at me. The cot had the right label, the baby had the right bracelet.

I insisted, so they checked the other babies and lo and behold, I was right, in those days, babies had a sticking plaster on their backs with the name written on..

The other mother didn't notice and was feeding him.

It was quickly brushed under the carpet and jokes were told..............(he is now 37)

Funnily enough, 5 years later, his best friend at school turned out to be that other baby, they were alike enough to be brothers.

With this in mind, my daughter insisted her baby never be out of sight of either her or her husband.

[polksaladallie]

Oh, Azure, that is a scary story.  Lucky you were assertive enough to stand your ground.

My babies had long dark hair, they couldn't have been lost.  But I never thought of it back then.  We saw them only at feeding times during the day.  Anything could have happened in the nursery.

[azureline**]

My first 2 had long dark hair, the others were bald and fair, lol. Fortunately, youngest son had rather large ears, like his dad.

[siggie-reported-by-alarmists]

When older children have been returned to their 'real' parents it did not work out.

I remember seeing a program several years ago regarding teenage children in foreign countries.

[lurker172602]

I remember feeling totally panicked seeing all the cots lined up outside the nurses station and thinking "I don't know which one is mine", and then worrying I had taken the wrong one.


Re the OP, like a lot of families these days, I don't think there is a right or wrong solution to this. I think I would try to establish some contact with the "lost" child while still parenting the other one. Much like some birth mothers now maintain a relationship with their adopted children without taking them away from their adoptive parents.

[softail-joanie]

Hard to say, think i'd have to be faced with it to know. I suppose whatever child I ended up raising, I'd still want in some way, to be in the other's life in some mannor.

[cherry*135]

The same thing (baby swap) happened in NZ in the area my family live in.

The girls were 10 yo when they were given the choice who they wanted to live with. From memory they were 8yo when the swap was discovered. (1992)

That must be one of the worst mistakes anyone can make, mixing up newborns.

Parents:
A couple
A single mother.

The girl living with the couple chose to stay there.

The girl living with the single mother wanted to live with the couple (biological parents) Her mother reluctantly gave her up. Her biological parents gained custody of her.

I think I would want my own child, but keep the other as above. That probably wouldn't work out though..other family wouldn't be likely to agree to that.

[creative*crisis]

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@am*3 wrote:
The same thing (baby swap) happened in NZ in the area my family live in.

The girls were 10 yo when they were given the choice who they wanted to live with. From memory they were 8yo when the swap was discovered. (1992)

That must be one of the worst mistakes anyone can make, mixing up newborns.

Parents:
A couple
A single mother.

The girl living with the couple chose to stay there.

The girl living with the single mother wanted to live with the couple (biological parents) Her mother reluctantly gave her up. Her biological parents gained custody of her.

I think I would want my own child, but keep the other as above. That probably wouldn't work out though..other family wouldn't be likely to agree to that.

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It would be interesting to know how it worked out in the long term for the girl who went back to her biological parents.

I wonder if she might have been having some issues with her mother , and saw that as an easier option, much in the way children of seperated and divorced parents want to go to the non custodial parent when they don't like the rules or conditions.