Dilemma. What would you do?

[daydream**believer]

Ok, this is quite a long story. I hope it makes sense. **Real names have not been used**

On the weekend, my daughter came to me  and said "Mum, theres something odd going on with some of my friends that i want to talk to you about cause im a bit worried"

She tells me that 3 of her friends (lets call them Tom, Jim and Sue) have made friends on facebook with a boy (lets call him John) they dont know who lives in Newcastle. Tom, Jim and Sue live in Adelaide.

Tom became friends with John first by receiving an out of the blue friend request from him.

John claims to be a 16 year old boy. His facebook page has lots of photos of him with heaps of friends. He's quite a good looking kid.

Tom think John is so cool and, via facebook, introduces him to Jim and Sue.

John strikes up quite a friendship with Sue and last week asked her to be his girlfriend. Sue is completely infatuated with John.

John has now said that his dad is going to bring him to Adelaide in a couple of weeks to meet Tom, Jim and Sue.

He has even said that a great place for them to all meet up would be the local swimming pool.

None of this sits right with me. Why a kid in Newcastle (a popular, good looking one according to his facebook page) would need to make friends with strangers in Adelaide. Would want one of them to be his girlfriend and then get his dad to bring him all the way over here to meet them.

Im not sure if you are all aware of the of the Carly Ryan story, but it is making me quite nervous about whats going on.

Carly Ryan- http://au.news.yahoo.com/today-tonight/lifestyle/article/-/7013312/internet-predators/

I know Jim's mother quite well and am going to talk to her about it all tomorrow. I know she has no idea who Jim talks to on facebook.

Im wondering, should i go to the police? They could at least investigate if John is real. I thought about going to the school, but all they would do is give a talk about internet predators and the kids would ignore it.

Over the weekend, my daughter tried to talk to Tom and Jim about the risks but they just didnt get it. They think John is so cool.

The whole "better to be safe than sorry" phrase keeps popping in my head.

Oh, and by the way, John's last name on facebook in Smith

[daydream**believer]

golden wattle-  the police are not going to let him know they are checking him out.

Im sure they will be able to find out if he's legit or not very quickly and then they wouldnt go knocking on his door saying "hey, we are investigating you cause someone thought you might be a sexual predator"

darki- his first name isnt John, i said in the OP **Real names have not been used**.

The last name he is using though is Smith.

BTW, the school he has listed as his school is in Massachusetts, U.S.A.

Now that could be because he is a real kid and is keeping his school location private OR he is a predator and is making it harder for anyone to look him up

[daydream**believer]

http://drphil.com/shows/show/1956/

thanks happy.

[*crikey*mate*]

LOL I went to school with a John Jones.

[izabsmiling]

Well done to you and your daughter Amy.

Have the parents of both of the boys been informed as well?

Who knows what the deal is with the OS School.

Could mean nothing...could be something....like someone setting something up for other like minded friends in this Country.

I'm sure that the police will check it all out...and take action if need be.

I would hope that the kids are all told that the police have been informed so that they know that that is what should be done in such a situation.If they understand that they may be more careful ,more aware and more likely to speak up when something isn't right.

[azureline**]

My nieces and nephews, all over 18, none of them have their real details on fb. It seems it is the thing to do.

[izabsmiling]

http://www.crisisconnectioninc.org/sexualassault/internetchild_sexual_predators.htm

Travelers - This group is comprised of predators who engage in online chat with children, and who use their skills of manipulation and coercion to meet the child in person for sexual purposes. Most "travelers" also collect child pornography. Travelers usually fall within the ages of 17 and 56, with the majority between the ages of 17-29. The distances these men will travel to consummate their online relationships are incredible, literally across the country and internationally.

[vampire-teddy]

i went school with a John Smith, he was a lovely guy.  His parents didn't have any imagination but shouldn't immediately make someone a victim of suspicion.

i so agree that if it turns out to be nothing big deal but if it is then a lot of trauma and danger could be averted.  your daughter is a very sensible girl.

I don't think they are either naughty or silly kids just very young and vulnerable.  13 is too young to be on facebook imo, you should have to be 16.

[lurker17260]

only if he is a fake.

if not, and he learns about it...well, how would you feel, beeing 15? or so accused of being a sex predator? he might need some counseling later on...

Yes he might, but I feel a lot more relaxed about that than I do about what may happen if he isn't legit.

I went out with a John Smith for a while.  It is very difficult to book anything, restaurants etc, with a name like that :^O

[katydidthat]

Years and years (decades, really) ago, I went to assist a political candidate in Wales.  His opponent had a very Welsh sounding name, and our guy, yep, you've guessed it, was called John Smith.  In Wales, this is not a good thing.  You are much more likely to win votes if you are called Evan Evans, David Thomas, Hugh Evans, Evan Thomas. Thomas Hughes,  Meirion Thomas Williams etc etc etc.  

Some brilliant mind worked out an excellent solution.  The slogan for the election was:

VOTE JOHN SMITH FOR PLAIN COMMON SENSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

He won ... and won again for many years 🙂

DDB please keep us posted on what happens.  

BTW, I asked my son about the situation and as a 15 year old, he thought it was very weird.

[daydream**believer]

i will definitely keep you posted if i am informed of anything more that is going on now.

BTW, the school counsellor spoke to my daughter privately yesterday and praised her for not only reporting this but having enough sense to know that it seemed suss. He was very proud of her