Dividing cremains

[*elizabeths-mum*]

I had never heard of people dividing the ashes of a loved one up until my FIL died 5 years ago.

Do many people do it and what sorts of reasons? I can see it happening more often in cases of divorce and remarriage with two families each wanting some which made me wonder would all the part cremain holders inter them with a plaque? 

[sandypas]

A friends mum died and she was originally from Scotland.  Most of her ashes were kept here but a small amount were taken back to her birth country.

[twinkles**stars]

I knew of a woman who lost her daughter in a car crash .....she would often open the container of ashes and rub her hands through it 😞 She sent small amounts to the girls friends....they didn't want them but this woman couldn't accept that. Odd.

[no_tv*10]

We lost our 20 month old a year ago this weekend and her 'fairy dust' as our other kids call it will be put inside jewellery so she can be with all of them on their future travels. The make lockets, pendants and watches etc. It's a nice way for some to always feel closer to their loved one. My mother is suffering terminal cancer and has always wanted to be buried. After seeing what we have done with our bub, she now wants to be cremated. She hopes our other children will take her with them too. It makes her feel like she will have a chance to all the things she never got to do. Makes the thought of dying a little bit easier for her.

[b3llag1na]

A friends son committed suicide  and his remains were divided up - some were delivered to a place that he had travelled to with his Dad years before (to be scattered), and had often told his family that was the happiest time in his life.

IMHO, I don't think there is a right or a wrong about this, as long as no one does things to deliberatley upset others.

[purple_haize]

When my son died, I asked the funeral place to give a quarter of his ashes to the girl he was engaged to, so she could keep some of him & she was happy with that.

I think these days, it is done for many reasons.

[*crikey*mate*]

I "inherited" some. I didn't want them. I'm glad he's dead. I went to his funeral to make sure he was dead.

Why did he leave them to me? Probably so he got the last laugh to let me know I couldn't even get him out of my life when he was dead.

My OH won't let me discard them in case I regret it if I ever stop being angry.

They're in a box wrapped in brown paper with the name written on them in black texta. (That's how I got them)

For now, at least, that's as gracious as I am able to be. 

So no, not all part cremain holders inter them with a plaque.

[j*oono]

Was that like a facebook sigh?

Rightyho then.  Who was he, what did he do to you and why are you angry.

[kennedia_nigricans]

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@crikey*mate wrote:

I "inherited" some. I didn't want them. I'm glad he's dead. I went to his funeral to make sure he was dead.

Why did he leave them to me? Probably so he got the last laugh to let me know I couldn't even get him out of my life when he was dead.

My OH won't let me discard them in case I regret it if I ever stop being angry.

They're in a box wrapped in brown paper with the name written on them in black texta. (That's how I got them)

For now, at least, that's as gracious as I am able to be. 

So no, not all part cremain holders inter them with a plaque.

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if you mix it with the cat litter you think the anger might turn into a triumphant feeling of deep satisfaction?

i will leave my body to science. after they took all the spare parts that are still good they can let medical students practise on the rest. they have to practise on something, and the more bodies they get, the fresher they can be used and don't have to be re-used over months by many students. i think it makes a difference if a student can practise on a fresh, untouched part instead of dissecting a year old piece that has been dissected by other students before cos there aren't enough fresh bodies. 

[the_great_she_elephant]

. I have absolutely no interest at all in what happens to my remains. Leaving my body to science would seem a useful way of disposing of it once I've finished with it, but  if my family aren't happy with that then Ill leave it entirely up to them to decide what would bring them the most comfort.

Call me callous if you like, but keeping the ashes of a person one vehemently disliked seems to me an absurdly morbid and masochistic practice.