@digital*ghost wrote:
@countessalmirena wrote:Oh, I think I know exactly what you mean, digital*ghost.
The people who become most offended are the ones who say things like "But I wouldn't mind having people walking through the house if I'm there" or "I don't mind being there to let people browse through my stock room if it means more sales" or "I don't care what the neighbours think since I know they're wrong"... because their view, preferences, stance and limits are the ones that you should take on, if you would only acknowledge it.
Nailed it 🙂 They don't think about other people having different circumstances and / or preferences, they just ascribe their own to everyone and seem shocked when they find out not everyone is the same. One buyer I had got aggressive when I declined, and while they said they understood I might not want people coming to my home, they didn't see why I couldn't just meet them somewhere (they lectured me about it and said "it's not hard!", and I just sat there wondering how they could possibly know something like that wouldn't be hard for me, like I could be wheelchair bound with no access to transport for all they knew. Maybe it wouldn't be hard if I had plenty of free time, a car and - perhaps more importantly - the willingness to meet someone who has just been incredibly rude to me, but they went straight on the BBL after that
).
I would report them to ebay too.
I once had someone randomly message me to litterally tell me I was a bogan for selling the free DVDs off caravan and 4WD magazines. I never bothered to respond, but I would assume it would be obvious that some people want to get back issues of them. I've also had messages from customers who were extremely grateful that I had the disc they were looking for.
Anyway, I blocked and reported him.
@digital*ghost wrote:I allowed pick up when I sold casually, and even bused into the city once to meet someone half-way, but things changed when I opened the store.
I now have a firm routine for my work days and trying to accomodate random pick-ups, meet-ups or drop-offs would be difficult. I also don't want the little spare time I have on the weekend or evenings interrupted, I don't want to stand at my front door awkwardly holding out little baggies of things and possibly get the neighbours whispering about what those bags contain
).
Along with all of the practical considerations, I know I am far too anti-social and introverted for all that, lol. It's why I chose online selling as a career in the first place, I guess.
(PS when I mentioned people being unreasonable jerks, it was more the ones that get angry when I say no, there's plenty of people who are accepting to understanding, but others act like I've just personally insulted them as well as intentionally inconvenienced them. None of these people ever know the circumstances of the person selling the item[s] they want to pick up, but they act like they just assume a complete stranger on the internet is able to accomodate whatever they want, and is therefore obliged to do so).
I totally understand and if i were running a business, I would be the same.
If you had an actual shop or warehouse that was open to the public, that might be different as you would have your operating hours and people dropping in would not be inconveniencing you.
But pick ups when you are not set up for that can be inconvenient. You do have to commit to be home for a certain period. People do stand you up & often without even a text to say they have changed their minds. (That's FB & GumT)
I particularly hate the attitude that meeting someone would be 'easy'. I once sold a pair of shoes and the first potential buyer expected me to go into the city, where she worked, to show her. It's 35km away. I countered and said I could meet her-at my local shopping centre.
I didn't think she would like it when the situation was reversed and I was right.
Going to a meeting place is inconvenient and costs money.
And with home pick ups, you are entitled to privacy and secirity.
@digital*ghost wrote:
@springyzone wrote:I find that pick up itself is a fine concept, but like anything, it depends a lot on how reasonable the buyer is and that you can't know till after the fact.
I've done a lot of pick ups, both as buyer & seller.
My last buyer was a FB woman who seemed eager to pick up. Maybe she expected to come round right then & there (it was 9.30pm). The next 2 days didn't suit so she made an appointment for 3 days later, changed it twice, didn't arrive at all, then next morning messaged me to say she would pick up at 11am that day! No "Sorry" or "Are you free?". When I replied it would have to be by 10.30am or after 2pm, she replied that I was making it too difficult so forget it.
So my attitude now is a bit soured. I must admit I have had a lot of great buyers but looking back, I think the key is if they are reasonable from the start, keen to fit in with a time that is mutual (not just what they want) and are willing to commit to a narrow time range eg 10am-10.30am. If they don't turn up, that's the end of them.
Pick up carries with it a slight security risk. Unless it is a heavy item, maybe furniture, I would not let strangers into my home. I have an enclosed front porch. They get no further than that.
I now have a firm routine for my work days and trying to accomodate random pick-ups, meet-ups or drop-offs would be difficult. I also don't want the little spare time I have on the weekend or evenings interrupted, I don't want to stand at my front door awkwardly holding out little baggies of things and possibly get the neighbours whispering about what those bags contain
I used to discourage people because they'd come here and window shop and I'd be left to put everything away afterwards. I don't mind a bit of work if they actually buy something but when I'm left exhausted it's too much. I'm not set up like a shop and have to get things out to show people and it's a lot of work, which they just don't appreciate. If it sells online it takes me a maximum of two minutes to find what sold because it's so well organised, but when people visit I end up with stuff all over the place.
I decided to allow a woman who lives just around the corner to come but I had strict rules, but of course they soon went by the wayside. I told her to look at my ebay listings first and make a list of what she wanted, but one day she came and asked what I had in a particular theme. When I asked her had she seen the ones on ebay she went on and on about how terribly busy she's been and just didn't have time to look. In other words, she couldn't be bothered taking two minutes to look at my ebay listings and preferred me to take half an hour to get them all out to show her. She thought she was far more important than anyone else and everything she said conveyed that, though she'd be oblivious to it.
A couple of times she'd tell me she wanted something specific but when I got it out she'd take half an hour to work out how much she needed - something she should have done before she came, but I'd have to stand around all that time waiting for her. With my health problems I have to pace myself and I can't afford to stand around for a couple of hours when the job should only take half an hour or less. Around town she's considered the ultimate drama queen and always has to talk about her ailments and be sicker than everyone else. I can put up with a certain amount of rubbish from buyers but when I got to the point I could barely stand I pulled the plug and said she couldn't come any more. My health isn't worth sacrificing for people like that. She only bought the best stuff that I can easily sell to others so I haven't lost anything. She's bought from me on ebay since but that's okay so long as I don't have her here. If she acts up I'll block her so fast her head will spin.
Buyers have no idea how much work is involved behind the scenes for sellers. It's enough to keep up with the good buyers without letting the others waste my time so I have no hesitation in blocking anyone who thinks it's okay to waste my time or to try and dictate to me. I once had a woman from the US beg me to sell her a particular fabric because the person who'd cut her project out did it wrong and I was the only person selling it in the whole world. Sorry, not my problem! She should have been more careful who she trusted with it, and how did I know the same thing wouldn't happen again?
@brerrabbit585 wrote:
My sister thinks I'm inferior to her because I'm not stinking rich like her, and also because I'm not married. She's a violinist and has a pretty highly trained ear so nothing but the best is good enough for her. I'm not sure what sort of acoustics their bluestone house has but she has a Bose (her husband had no say in that). I've had singing lessons but will never reach her level of expertise so I'm quite happy with my Sony sound system, but on one of their rare visits she insisted on rearranging it because I "didn't have it set up properly". I asked her to leave it alone but she insisted it had to be fixed and totally ignored me. While she was doing that her husband sat down at my computer (without asking) and started to run a defragmenting program. In those days I hadn't even heard of defragmenting and it tied up my computer for hours.
Holy moly 
I love my brother to death, but when he visits he likes to fidget with whatever is in closest proximity, so we'll be chatting away and he'll pick up one of my tools and fiddle, like my measuring tape and start coiling it tightly, a couple of times he's grabbed the end of my roll of bubble wrap and just absently started popping it, meanwhile I'm sitting there, carrying on the convo but internally
But yeah, I've got it easy. I would have screamed blue murder if someone had the audacity to do that in my home.
