My in laws stayed in their home for as long as possible with as much outside assistance as they were able to get. She was his carer. Unfortunately their nearest family was my SiL who live about an hours drive away.
Eventually, after MiL almost burned the house down using hot cooking oil, it was decided they needed more care than could be provided at home, so they moved into a home near us. They were initially very resistant (him more than her) but after a short while they both settled in and enjoyed living there.
Late last year he passed away and it became apparent just how much she had actually been relying on him day to day. Getting from their room to the dining room, communicating with staff, etc. She has now been moved to the secure dementia unit and is deteriorating more and more every day. M visits two or three times a week and always comes home very sad.
Jane, I so admire the work you and your colleagues do. It must be soul destroying nursing people you know are never going to get better. I wish you were valued more by the wider community.
