@buzzlightyearsgirlfriend wrote:
@2106greencat wrote:
I am not perfect, never will be, but I don't hurt people, I like to help if I can, and while I understand someone who has been 'burnt' before may be jaded, I couldn't imagine just turning my back on someone who needs me.
Try begging a belligerent drunk to STFU at 3am when you have to get up to go to work the next day.
Try begging a belligerent drunk to stop being rude and abusive.
Try begging a belligerent drunk to stop lying to their bosses about why they can't go to work and using the "kids are sick, I have to stay home" excuse when the kids are already on the bus on their way to school...
Try begging a belligerent drunk to PLEASE PLEASE GET HELP!
After being burned quite a few times I have turned my back on the drunks and addicts in my family and in my life.
I choose to put myself first and not to allow their self inflicted drama to **bleep** with my life.
@2106greencat wrote:Buzz, you have obviously been hurt before, I have no way of knowng how or how badly, but I hope that you may one day find it in yourself to understand that alcoholism isn't a choice, it is an addiction.
Yep. And those that choose to stay addicted when I have made it **bleep**ing CRYSTAL CLEAR that I am DONE with their addictions have no place in my home or in my life.
@2106greencat wrote:Joono - I agree with the sentiment, but having almost walked through the gates of hell I am grateful I had someone who cared enough to help me choose another path (no matter how hard every day) and if it wasn't for the love of my kids, I might not be here arguing this point with you all.
You probably would be here but you'd be a messy, blubbering PITA.
I have been through each and every one of those steps you mentioned Buzz (I was married to an abusive alcoholic for 12 years).
And in the end, marriage over, because as you said, he did not want help, he did not have a problem.
My initial response to you was without any of this information (not that you should be required to give it) but now that you have, yes, I fully inderstand why you have turned away from those you DID try to help.
That was my first point - in your original post - you blanketed 'all alcoholics' as a waste of space, and all should be ignored and left to kill themselves, and going by your expereince I see why you feel that way, but you failed to mention at the start that you did try to help your family, so you did have empathy, and I am sorry you got hurt.
I don't however believe I am a waste of space, and thankfully for me, my kid's didn't either - and i loved them enough to get that help.
@2106greencat wrote:Thanks freddie, that means the world to me.
I am not perfect, never will be, but I don't hurt people, I like to help if I can, and while I understand someone who has been 'burnt' before may be jaded, I couldn't imagine just turning my back on someone who needs me.
Buzz, you have obviously been hurt before, I have no way of knowng how or how badly, but I hope that you may one day find it in yourself to understand that alcoholism isn't a choice, it is an addiction.
And yes, it is weak to bow to an addiction, but we are not all superman!
Joono - I agree with the sentiment, but having almost walked through the gates of hell I am grateful I had someone who cared enough to help me choose another path (no matter how hard every day) and if it wasn't for the love of my kids, I might not be here arguing this point with you all.
Pretty sure GC was assuming j*oono was responding to this duff - that's how I took it when I saw it too
