Cat_mioux's new home

[cat_mioux]

:^O

[freddie*rooster]

If anyone is interested in what we can't talk about here, could you please email me.

A helping hand always makes a difficult situation so much easier.

♥ :-x

[anors2]

:-x:-x All of you girls and guys are totally amazing with the support you have given Cat. I cant always get on here (owing to my own situation) but I have read all threads devoted to Cat. And yes I cannot really say any more than you all have said........your support is beyond belief but I know what the Aussie Spirit is like. I personally went through the 2003 bushfires that ravaged the High Country in Victoria and even tho its a different sort of loss.....it still takes the very roots of your heart away. The furry friends that you loved..gone...all you worked for in your home and garden....gone...BUT THERE IS AN UPSIDE TO THIS CAT. It will TAKE TIME.....and time is a wonderful healer. I guess in life none of us a born with an EVERYTHING IS GOING TO GO RIGHT ALL OUR LIVES.

So Cat my heart is with you on this one:-x love gods little four legged friends that you have...... they aak nothing in return but to be loved......deep breaths.....take strength in yourself......BELIEVE in YOU......there are better times to come.:-x And above all know that all of the posters on this thread are 100% behind you in what ever your decision is:-x

I have my ORANGE UNDIES ready and waiting for 14th Feb. I will wear them at work with pride....may even have to flash them lol lol lol:-x

If I could put a piccie on here I would of my two lovely CATS. Dont know how.

[oldgoldau]

I'm so sorry to read that life is not great for you Cat, but is he not repeating the circumstances under which you met and got together? You have said more than once that you met him online, met in person, fell into bed within a couple of hours, and then stayed there for days without surfacing. It sounds to me as if this is his usual pattern and he is sticking with it because it works for him. He relocated to be with you and now he is relocating back again to be with her.
He has done you a favor by continuing his ways, and who knows whether she is the first in the years that you have lived together? He is weak, you are strong! Hang in there dear girl you will get past this and build a strong happy life for yourself and the kitties. god bless xxx

[not.happy.jan]

Catty, I've MIA for a while but wanted to let you know how amazingly you are doing. And Cynthe, you describe exactly how I felt. Such strong women.

So many brilliant posts, so much positive energy and healing thoughts. I'm sure we are all learning and growing through this thread. It also helps to know so many of us are not alone with what we went through. That our feelings and thoughts were so natural at the time even though we thought we would go mad with the pain we felt. I remember having to go to the doctors cos I had this pain in my shoulders and chest and he told me it was stress. He also told me, god love him, it was my heart breaking but it would be mended and the best treatment was to look after me and let the pain come out by crying or any way that made me feel better. Was the best advice I ever had.

You don't have to be strong. That's unnatural. You are going through something that is going to cause your emotions to be all over the place. Let them come. Work through them and you won't be carrying them with you in future.

I'm gunna get me a pair of them those orange undies and wear them with pride on the 14th.

And I hope the fleas of a thousand camels infest nonads armpits and if he doesn't like it he can suffer in his jocks. :^O:^O

You go GIRL!

[cynthecowgirl]

What a lovely GP you had jan. I went to a stranger to see if she could help me make the world stop coz I couldn't cope and wanted to get off.......just for a bit...until I could get back on again. All she did was give me the day off (big deal) and refer me for counselling.
I ended up in tears at my own work with one of our GP's and he ended up being my saving grace. He gave it to me straight, which at the time was a real slap in the face, but looking back it was just the honest truth and what I needed to hear......just not what I wanted to hear at that time.
His no nonsense common sense approach worked. He also told me to keep the house, which I scoffed at at the time........coz in my opinion, he's a wealthy doctor with no idea about how scabby my finances were. But he never wavered from that thought and as I've already said, I did keep the house.....and the debt that goes with it. But it's mine and I'm having a fair crack at keeping it. Anything is possible if you want it bad enough. ANYTHING!

[soundcollector65]

Hi Cat,

there is some really good advice re de facto relationships in this link.........

It may have info that you haven't considered.

http://www.moneymanager.com.au/planning/guides/living_guide.html#step5

[keeliaclare]

jan, you're GP was really lovely....I had a similar thing when I presented with lower back pain on the left side of my spine, and dreadful shoulder/neck pain on the same side of my body a good twelve months after we separated. My GP said it was part of the symptoms of grief and I had held it in for so long, it had to surface somehow...

As everyone else has said the material stuff doesn't matter...I was very lucky, my breakup ws reasionably amicable (if there really is such a thing) and I got to keep the things which were dear to me, including most of the antique furniture which I had sourced and restored, he kept the electronic stuff and the bedroom furniture, so for a time I found myself sleeping on a single bed and watching a very old, very small TV, but gradually I bought "stuff", and it was a good feeling not having to consult/argue with anyone over what size TV, soft or hard mattress etc.......

You will get there Cat, for now you have the things you need most, your beloved cats, your self respect and loads of friends!

xxxx

[mainecoon1]

Cat I take my hat off to you, what you are going through most be very hard.

If what Mr ex says is true at least now you know you only have to wait until March to start living your life again.

I wonder if his family knows the relationship has ended because he has a skank in his life. If they did know I wonder if they would be so helpful

Let him take what he wants regarding positions, furniture is worthless and not worth arguing over. As long as he does not take your self respect, dignity and cats away from you.

Take heart that you have so many friends and family that do love and care for you, don't let one man destroy you he truly is not worth it

[mainecoon1]

Sorry that should be possessions not positions and I also meant to give you a big HUG

[rosymog]

missmioux

your ex is an idiot and still telling you what to do.
ie
he is taking the couch etc

You have a voice cat, use it
say no, just say no

tell him no, stand your ground, it may not end up that you will keep the lounge, but at least you have stood your ground and got a bit of that anger out.
Its not about the couch, its the fact that he 'told' you what he wants to take

just say no
say the legal people have to work this out
ie furntiure, stuff accumulated over the years, super etc, and as for names on leases, if he wants his name off, don't do it for him, tell him to get off his lazy stupid backside and do it himself, don't do it for him, you are not his doormat , if the power is in his name l would be asking for a bill and present it to him to pay half etc, switch it over to your name then.

stop letting him 'stay there until he is ready to move
after everyone else runs around for him getting him a house that is. what a piss poor excuse for a man.

Sorry but l am a bit angry, why should he treat you like that, telling you what he wants and how he wants it and when he is taking it etc etc.

just say NO.
l am sure he will get angry and try to bully you.
Might help if someone was with you when confronting the bully, l wish to heck l was there to 'hold up yer orange undies with you'

l am just so annoyed that 'he deemed to tell you what he is taking, instead of sitting down like an adult *which he is, albeit a pisspoor excuse for one"
and sorting out furniture,bills etc

pfffft he is good riddance, but don't make it any easier for him then necessary, tell him family he is a pig, tell the husband of the thing he is 'affairing ' it with
tell the whoever wants to listen

and with luck he will be thoroughly ashamed that you have brought his dirty washing out in public, he is as they say in the old world 'a cad' bring it out into the light and watch him burn lsay,

what can he do that he hasn't done to you already
he has hurt your heart miss kitty
Sending you love and light to protect that and many here wish you the same.
l just want to smak him hard and rub chilli juice in his jox, so when he wears them and the jox heats up, so does *coughs* otehr areas.

big love miss kitty
waves the orange chundies high!!:-)