Cat_mioux's new home

[cat_mioux]

:^O

[silvernanny22]

:-x

[thebraff]

Snipe  :-x

[thebraff]

Nice to see you in her Kylie and hello to our newest lurker leaving a :-x

Higs and hugs to everyone.

Dtrh is sounds like you had a wonderful day.

very special.

Mindtoo, how wonderful for another bub to love and cherish.  Congratulations to all the family.

MsCat not long to wait for your holiday.

Cyn, I forgot to mention your post from the other day, so thank you to Kylie for reminding me.

Yes, it did seem like a very happy, proud post.  I hope it continues for you.  :-x

Hi Flannie  *waves*

Jack, sometimes you have to give in if you are feeling extremely tired.  Enjoy the rest of your sleep.

Waving to Cuddly, MIA, She ele and all the other OK'ers that come through here.

Which reminds me, I was in the shop with the red bulls eye and they had a stack of new orange knickers if anyone is looking to get some.  New as in a new range, not that they are new as opposed to second hand ) 😉

Hello to all the lurkers whether you leave a 🙂 or not, but to tell you the truth, I get a big :-x when I see a new name and a little message like that.

Have a great day everyone.

[the_great_she_elephant]

:-):-x:-)

[cat_mioux]

Hi more Lovely Lurkers! I didn't realise so many people were reading this thread. :-x

Jacks congrats on winning the $100 voucher! You go girl! What do you think you'll spend it on? Here's my advice .. buy something you wouldn't normally feel justified spending $100 on, like a gorgeous vase, cushion, ornament. 😄

dtrh I'm so happy you had a lovely birthday. Old fashioned roses are beautiful. The new watch sounds lovely too.

Kylie darling I hope Samantha takes to riding in her pram soon! You girls need to be able to go for a walk or shopping during the day.

freakiness! Congrats on the new concept! I love your humour and enthusiasm! A wifi shop while you get your clothes altered etc? Wishing you all the best for opening day!

mindtobusy congrats on your new little grandson :-x

hugs to all whom post here, Cuddly, b3lla, cyn, flannie, koko, oh poop I knew I forget people but I'm still hugging you! To those MIA and those lovely lukers :-x

I guess it's time for a recap. I don't know the reasons why so many people read this thread but I do know some have experienced infidelity personally, some perhaps want to be inspired, some are quietly cheerleading in the background ...:-x

12 months on. Wow! To be honest, I still think about "it" every day but only fleetingly at odd times. Most of the time I feel content and the majority of the time I feel hopeful about the future. I don't know what's in store for me but I have faith.

My keyboard has been stuffed and causing me strife for months, jumping letters and spaces between letters. I just put up with it, until last week I cleaned my keyboard and broke it. I replaced it with a new keyboard and voila! no more problems.

Now I have a point to this story ... :^O

I realised I tend to tolerate way more than I need to. Which brings me to the point of my story.

For years I tolerated the problems in my relationship with Mr Ex. He never ever looked after my needs. Ever. One night I had a bad asthma attack and he begrudgingly took me to emergency but moaned and grumbled the whole time he sat by my bed while I'm struggling to breath. He left me there after a couple of hours and I had to call my sister and daughter. If I had a migraine he'd refuse to walk across the road to the chemist. But when he had the sniffles or a headache I'd hand him his pandol and fussed over him  ....

The last couple of years he refused to take me out. Kept saying he was too busy or too tired. He'd get jealous and cranky if I went out with my friends. He'd even walk around me and sigh if I spent more than 10 mins on the phone.

When I'd finally crack it, he'd throw me a crumb of affection and I'd be back thinking everything was OK again. But it would only last a week or two and he'd be back to ignoring me again.

I tolerated a crappy relationship for way more than I should have. There were times I thought about leaving him, but I loved him and didn't want to hurt him. And if thruth be told .. I was too afraid to start all over again on my own at 50.

Mr Ex wasn't happy. I begged him to meet me half way in fixing our relationship but he dismissed me. He made the monumental mistake of looking for another person to make him happy. He'll always be unhappy until he realises his unhappiness comes from within himself. One night before I found out about his affair, I turned to him and said "you know it's not me making you unhappy" and he quietly said "I know". It was the only truthful thing he said during that time of lies and deceit.

We all know how it ended. I could have saved myself the trauma of being betrayed if I'd had the courage to leave years ago. And you need more than love to keep a relationship going. You need trust, team work, caring for each others needs and being responsible for your own happiness and each putting in 100% into the relationship. And here's the big one. When you first meet someone, they will tell you the truth about themselves. Listen to them. They will show you the red flags. Look for them. They are there. Don't ever think you can 'fix' them. Don't ever think your love with change the person.

So that's what I've learned about relationships.

What I've learned about me, besides the fact I tolerate crap for way too long ... I'm way stronger than I thought I was.

I can do this. We can do this. :-x

[my2cuddlycats_not]

:-x:-x:-x:-x

[blacksheep9772]

Hugs everyone!  :-x

Cat, you are so right!  Couldn't have said it better myself.  🙂

[dtrh3]

good morning all higs and hugs :-x

ms Cat your last post is v thoughtful and inspiring..you have grown so much in the past year and though all the pain and sadness have built on your awareness and integrity..you have a lot to be proud of : we are proud of you...:-xonly a couple of weeks to go and then you can re focus and chill

braff:-x sending warm healing energy to Alicia- she is making such progress little by little, bit by bit, one day at a time I hope she has a good day today

Im v glad that Avas family loved the care package...it was a joy to make the cross stitch for her :-x

mindtoo :-x congratulations on your new grandson..pisces are old souls and v sensitive :-x (like cj and I!!)nice to see you here 🙂

off to retailworld now (bbl) to all others, have a good day

you can do it you can do it you can do it

[jack*in*a*box]

Well done Cat. You seem to have found the bigger picture and have put things in perspective. That's a hard task. We always miss 'what could have been' or 'what once was'. In the moment, we look at the happier times and that is what we miss.

You are on the right track. All that in one year. You are clever :-x

It took me much much longer to see what you have realised.

[cat_mioux]

Hi Fabulous Posters, Lovely Lurkers and those MIA :-x

I forgot to say hi to Ms Braff! Hugs for Alicia. Sally is getting better in baby steps. At the moment she is struggling to put on weight but overall .. moving forward.

I have learned a lot haven't I?:-D  Sheesh did I have to learn it so late in life? Oh well, there is always the next life. I doubt very much I'll ever allow a man into my life again. I think if Mr Ex was decent enough to leave with whatever integrity he had left and not given me such a hard time i.e threatening to hit me, taking half the furrniture, threatening to kick me and the kitties into the street, wanting to live as housemates (WT!)  .. maybe I wouldn't have been left so traumatised. If it's that hard getting a man out of my life then I never want to take that risk again. But who knows? A year isn't very long in the big scheme of life. Perhaps I need another year of healing before I make the decision to live peacefully alone with my animals (so want to get a doggie).

This week I'm replacing my boss *sigh*. I miss him already.

Have a wonderful day everyone :-x