Hubby is irritating, annoying habits - had enough

[ashjoma]

My hubby  and I had an argument this evening and he walked out (offended as usual) and has come back.

I had some bags of my daughters too small clothing for a friend and some new expensive kids clothing for putting on Ebay and I had asked him to leave it to one side.

It vanished this morning and he denied knowing anything and said he had not touched it.

I searched and searched  ( and he knew I was searching) and asked him again this evening and then he said he had put it all in the charity bin up the road, 

I got angry and said he should leave my things alone and how dare he throw my possessions out.

He then stormed off, saying he was leaving and staying in a motel - came back about 30 minutes later.

This is not the first time he has done this - I regularly find my things in the bin - eg expensive pashmina blanket,  clothing, my books and magazines, university work,  kids toys

- once I found my brand new camera equipment in the garbage bin. still in the packaging

When we moved, I found my 2 boxes of beloved knitting patterns in the bin and he tried to divert me from finding them.

Some sentimental items have also vanished.

Last week, I found  my shopping in the bin - cans of soup, baked beans and tomato sauce. Straight in the bin.

He never asks - I find this so rude and disrespectful. I would not throw his things out.

If I ask, he either denies it or says he can't remember and looks uncomfortable.

His father threw out my daughter's  wooden rocking horse, which my father had lovingly restored for her and my son's beloved blanket. No asking me. And then had the hide to deny anything about the blanket, before saying that he did throw it out because he thought my son was too old for it.

So I can see where it all comes from.

I have hired a storage unit and will quietly move the majority of my possessions there so I have some privacy and he cannot just throw out my things.

I find him so disrespectful that he thinks he can do this.

And then he gets so offended when questioned and I say I am unhappy and storms off.

thanks - vent over.

[kengillard]

I don't remember reading that eloi?

[superscanner4]

You are clearly not a hoarder, it is not a reaction to that.  If he was just throwing out the things he knew were of sentimental value to you, that would indicate a control issue.  But no.  Throwing out random things that are both new, old, expensive cheap, and in particular the weekly groceries indicates something much more serious, this behaviour is far from being normal.

You need to get him to a psychiatrist.  If it's not a delusional disorder (with psychosis) then another possibility to consider is some form of dementia.

You definitely need to get your things to a safe place.

[not_an_eloi]

who ?   the father, or the husband

haha  !

[vampire-teddy]

life is far too short to live it in misery for either you or your children.  do they notice his odd behaviour?  he sound either ill or a complete control freak.  i truly hope things improve for you