Mum has 'no regrets' after shaming daughter

[daydream**believer]

http://www.essentialkids.com.au/older-kids/behaviour-and-discipline-for-older-kids/mum-has-no-regret...

"A North Carolina mother who punished her daughter for bullying is being accused of being a cyberbully herself after she shamed her daughter by sharing her photo online.

Cara Schneider had her daughter pose with a green sign that reads,

My name is Hailey. I am a kind caring, smart girl, but I make poor choices with social media.

As punishment, I am selling my iPod and will be donating the money to the charity Beat Bullying in hopes of changing my behavior as well as bringing awareness to Bullying. Because bullying is wrong."

Thoughts on this?

I personally agree with the guy that defended the mum by writing ‘‘Bullying thrives in secrecy. Bringing it into the light is the only way to stop it. And this mother isn't bullying her child; she’s teaching her daughter to take responsibility for her actions and also teaching her compassion by walking a mile in her victim’s choices.’’

I asked my 13 year old daughter what she thought of this and she also agrees with what the Mum did. She said "The girl was bullying people online, hiding behind the computer so her punishment should be shared online as well"

[catsnknots]

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@*pepe wrote:

...and those saying this is going to blow over in a day or two have obviously forgotten what high school was like.

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I am wondering how the girl that was being bullied felt about going to school and having to face that bully but then also having to go home and face the bully online... 

[cherry*135]

and those saying this is going to blow over in a day or two have obviously forgotten what high school was like.

That was more in relation to the photo going viral worldwide.

If this girl gets flak at high school then she will know how the people she bullied felt like.

She may get some respect for owning up to her bullying and apologising for it.

[catsnknots]

When one of my kids was young he stole an Easter egg and shoved it down his pants... he didn't know I saw him do it. 

I took him up to the manager of the store and told the manager that my son just stole an egg and put it down his pants. The manager asked for it back and my son reached down and grabbed it out and handed it back looking totally humiliated... 

He has never once stolen anything since .... ever.... 

I had never shown him how to steal, he just did it.. that mother may not have shown that girl how to bully, she probably just did it... 

Sometimes things work and sometimes they don't . 

I hope this lesson works for the mother and at least she did something unlike the bullies parents that tormented one of my kids for months and months... 

[*pepe]

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@catsnknots wrote:

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@*pepe wrote:

...and those saying this is going to blow over in a day or two have obviously forgotten what high school was like.

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I am wondering how the girl that was being bullied felt about going to school and having to face that bully but then also having to go home and face the bully online... 

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she probably felt hunted and hounded and like there was nowhere for her to go to where she could just be left in peace to get on with her life...

[cherry*135]

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@*pepe wrote:

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@catsnknots wrote:

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@*pepe wrote:

...and those saying this is going to blow over in a day or two have obviously forgotten what high school was like.

---

I am wondering how the girl that was being bullied felt about going to school and having to face that bully but then also having to go home and face the bully online... 

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she probably felt hunted and hounded and like there was nowhere for her to go to where she could just be left in peace to get on with her life...

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and the girls/boys (not reported who/how many she bullied) she continually cyberbullied ( even after the mother disciplined her in other ways to get her to stop doing that).. would they have felt the same?

Will those continually bullied by this girl finally be relieved now?

[*pepe]

i don't know, maybe you could ask them.

[cherry*135]

Maybe you could ask the girl who was disciplined if she was hunted & hounded when she went back to school after being outed, also.

[patchoo78]

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@izabsmiling wrote:

The Mum did what SHE did  with intent to publicly shame and humiliate ....

she herself is a bully 

and she has shown her daughter that 'sometimes' it's OK 

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It's not as if the Mother straight away jumped to this punishment, she had tried multiple things and it was only after they had all failed that she resorted to this.. 

[just_me_karen]

Lol at the Easter egg incident.

The difference is, your behaviour showed your son that actions have consequences..ditto for the manager's behaviour in not humiliating & abusing him (I'm assuming that).

It is normal child behaviour to nick things that they desperately desire. Do you think your son would have turned out differently if:

- he had seen you shoplifting

- you laughed at his stealing

- you saw but did nothing

- you made him wear a sign saying "I am a thief" and parading him around town.

Any of those behaviours could have helped your son to develop negative behaviours in response to your modelling. As it was, you modelled good behaviour and he would have learned to make better decisions due to him witnessing the consequences of his actions.

[patchoo78]

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@izabsmiling wrote:

from the OP 

Cara Schneider, an avid Crossfitter, says she didn't expect the photo shaming her daughter to get spread around as much as it has but has no regrets about it. 

no regrets for shaming her own daughter online .......

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It's not going to kill the girl to feel a little bit of shame.. She should feel ashamed for bullying people online.