My Mum Passed Away Yesterday But...

[grapes_collector]

I'm not feeling overwhelming grief. Just relief that she is out of her misery.

She was such a good Mum to me (I'm an only child), and we were very close. She had dementia, but she always knew me (she called me her very best friend) and she always talked about me to the staff at the nursing home, but she couldn't remember anything about her past life, including my late father, & had to be told things over and over again.

The last week was hell for her, as she had been in a lot of pain, felt nauseous and had been unable to eat or drink. The last few days she had slept (thankfully).

I'm worried that I should be feeling more. The only time I cried was when I saw her body. I've also come down with the most ferocious cold, the worst I can remember for many years, so I'm selfishly feeling sorry for myself, when I should be feeling more for Mum.

I've come here because I don't have anyone to talk to...just hubby, who I might add is being fantastically supportive, but I just can't tell him how I'm feeling.

Just needed to get it off my chest.

[the_great_she_elephant]

Honey, you haven't had time yet to start missing her - it's as if she'd just gone away for a while. The 'foreverness' of her absence won't hit for a while, but when it does you will most certainly grieve.  

[debra9275]

Sorry to hear of your loss grapes. 

[krazy.kiwi]

Sorry to hear of your loss Grapes. :-x

When my grandfather died suddenly, we were gutted. None of us expected it, the only thing that stopped us from losing it was that he would have wanted to go suddenly.

But when my grandmother and my MIL died after battles with cancer, it was easier for us to deal with. I think it's because we have time to adjust to the loss before it happens.

I still miss my Gran and my MIL deeply, but when I heard they had passed, I felt an immediate relief both times - then felt guilty for it.

[kopenhagen5]

I'm worried that I should be feeling more.

Don't be. That is often a sign of someone that knows the inevitable and feels the passing is timely. And as others have said some grieving may come later although not necessarily.

I still have my parents so am yet to experience that part of my journey.

I am sure your mother lived a long full life if you don't mind me asking her age?

And if it's not too much may we have a name to marry the wonderful images of this person with? 

:-x

[the_bob_delusion]

I think your feeling is more you've at peace now and she was too. 

[kopenhagen5]

Well said bob. :-x

[Anonymous]

♥ My thoughts, love and gentle hugs are with you Grapes.♥

♥ May your Mum rest in peace.♥

love Di & Andrew xo

[serendipityricho]

Grapes--a sad time for you.

Cherish the memories of the good times.

Her pain and suffering is over.

My Mum passed away in 1951 when i was 4 years old,

Have no memories just a couple of small b+w photos.

Take care.........................Richo.

[2106greencat]

Your Mum sounds like a good Mum...as such she would want you to take care of you.She is at peace now :-x

That sums up what I wanted to say but couldn't find the words. :-x

Hope you don't mind me borrowing it Iza

[lobs211]

Sorry for your loss Grapes

Sending strength :-x