On The First Date, Would You...

[icyfroth]

...let the guy pay for dinner or do you insist on paying your own?

This came up for discussion in yesterday's breakfast show.

Sami believes the guy should pay on the first date, its a chivalrous gesture.

Yumi says absolutely not, it's sexist, old-fashioned and old.

[illicit69]

Like Dixo, I’m old fashioned (never did burn my bra), if a  man asks you out for dinner or drinks, he pays, picks me up from home, does not beep the horn but comes to the door, opens the car door, then upon return to my home walks me to my front door. Worked every time for me, and O/H still open the car door for me. 

[soul_art]

I think the person who does the asking is the one who should pay.  After that if there are more dates, it can be talked about so both are happy with the arrangements.

[cherry*135]

Maybe on the first date the person who asked the other one out for dinner/drinks should pay.

I would prefer to pay 1/2 each, then I  wouldn't feel obligated to see them again after the first date, if you didn't like them much.

Be interesting to know if people in their 20's (with jobs, not poor Uni students) still go for the male pays for dinner/drinks thing.

I can open my own car door.

[freakiness]

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@newstart2380 wrote:

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@freakiness wrote:

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@icyfroth wrote:

...let the guy pay for dinner or do you insist on paying your own?

This came up for discussion in yesterday's breakfast show.

Sami believes the guy should pay on the first date, its a chivalrous gesture.

Yumi says absolutely not, it's sexist, old-fashioned and old.

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Whichever rule applies make sure you agree first. 

I think it's old fashioned to expect the man to pay, but each situation and event is different and I'd decide accordingly.

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but if you pay half (when HE asked you out) and you don't see him again you are out of pocket, MMMMM much better the money in your wallet.

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I said nothing about paying half.  If I didn't want to see him again best I paid for myself than owe him a dinner after he paid for the first one, especially if he is one of those who equate paying for dinner or coming in for coffee as in invitation for sex.

[i-need-a-martini]

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@freakiness wrote:

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I said nothing about paying half.  If I didn't want to see him again best I paid for myself than owe him a dinner after he paid for the first one, especially if he is one of those who equate paying for dinner or coming in for coffee as in invitation for sex.

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Agree.

I would never let a guy pay on the first and subsequent few dates. Anything beyond that can be worked out mutually.

[cherry*135]

but if you pay half (when HE asked you out) and you don't see him again you are out of pocket, MMMM

If you pay 1/2 the costs with another person for a meal, you are hardly out of pocket, you did get a meal to eat.

The poor man could be seriously out of pocket, if he kept asking females out for a meal  which he paid for and they just used him as a meal ticket.

[icyfroth]

If a guy asks me out to dinner, I expect him to pay. If he doesn't. there's no second date.

OH still pays when we go to lunch or dinner together.

Yumi says Sami earns more money than the guy in some cases and she should offer to pay.

Sami says it's not about the money, it's the gesture. It's chivalrous and romantic.

Hi Dixo right back atcha.

I have to go be back later.

[nicnacs_4u]

Yes please

[icyfroth]

nicbuddy

[freakiness]

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@icyfroth wrote:

If a guy asks me out to dinner, I expect him to pay. If he doesn't. there's no second date.

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 What does he get out of it?

Does it make a difference if he earns less?