Public Property ?

[lakeland27]

today i had an incident occur involving my 3 and 3 quarter year old son . its something that happens reasonably often.. and i wonder if it is rude of me to respond in the way i do.

I take him with me to the local shopping precinct in order to run some errands , and he tends to attract a bit of attention from some 'ladies' there as he is rather a cute little chap (its in his DNA 🙂 thanks tone).

anyway, the first lady drops down to his level and says 'i'd like to take him home .. what a gorgeous little boy.. etc'' i say 'yes , a lot of people say that' (or something similarly bland) and the woman ignores me totally and continues to annoy him with tickles and other unwanted attention. I take his hand and walk on only for the same thing to happen again... lady talks to my son and ignores me totally. dont get me wrong, i don't want the attention of these people.. but i do get annoyed with the ignorant behaviour so i asked the 3rd person not to talk to him, and told her to 'retreat' in no uncertain terms as the boy gets tired of it himself. needless to say person No3 gets irate and calls me various things .

am i being unreasonable ? it seemed a fair number in the crowd there thought so.

[izabsmiling]

he's told me he doesn't like it very clearly and a i have to consider his wishes.

I agree.

In that case I'd simply ask them to please not do that as he doesn't like it :-).

[donnashuggy]

here is a good one:

[lakeland27]

Aren't you setting him a bad example by being rude to people who are paying him a compliment? Do you think the praise from strangers, or its rejection by his mother, would be more beneficial to his self esteem?

i thought i was his father? he (unlike me) has no problems with self esteem . he thinks he's terrific and quite rightly so ..  i think teaching him he doesn't have to endure molestation by a bunch of crazed overly maternal types is not unreasonable. 😛

[azureline**]

yes, I agree, it is your job to teach him about boundaries and what he doesn't have to endure 🙂

Let them have it was just a figure of speech, didn't mean to imply that you did that.

[just_me_karen]

Oops sorry, I forgot were are the dad

[kayza40]

i didn't so much 'let her have it'  as ask her to 'let go of him' as she had him by the arm. he's told me he doesn't like it very clearly and a i have to consider his wishes. thanks for the opinions 🙂

Good on you LL, that was so rude of her to touch your child like that.  He is not public property and I'm pleased you protected him.  To many weird people out there to let our young ones think it's ok to trust strangers.  Unfortunately I think that also needs consideration in this day and age. 

You don't want him to think it's ok for strangers to just walk up and be grabbing at him.  I don't think you did anything wrong at all. 

[lakeland27]

thanks for the replies. 🙂 all good advice too (apart from you karen, always making the trouble :-p)

[nero_bolt]

possibly iza 🙂 i can be a little caustic.

Thats a massive understatement of your personality LL...  Me I think I would use the words A LOT in that statement 🙂 

needless to say person No3 gets irate and calls me various things .

She probably got  it right 🙂

(its in his DNA thanks tone).

Are you thanking Tony Abbott for his DNA there LL  as you often refer to Tony Abbott as "Tone" 🙂

[katydidthat]

People should know their boundaries around children.  I was at an airport in Australia, having just got back from the UK.  My son was little (in a pushchair) and tired.  I was tired and stressed and just wanted to get out of there.  So, we were waiting for the luggage to get released and it was a long wait.  As the suitcases started to appear, my son was behind me, and he was crying.  I wanted to get the luggage and go as quickly as possible, so I focused on the luggage.  

Suddenly, he stopped crying.  I turned around and some woman had given him a large chunk of chocolate and he was eating it.  He was allergic to peanuts.  Most chocolate "may contain traces of peanuts".  She didn't ask me or talk to me, just gave it to him.  I was furious ... I grabbed the chocolate and threw it towards a bin (you'll all be impressed to know that it landed right inside, I should have played cricket).  Another woman spoke up and said "She was only trying to be kind".  

I can't remember but I may have used some bad language 😉  

It's  important to ask parents BEFORE giving a child food or drink.  It's important to read the signals that children and parents are sending.  Children may be cute and lovable, but, no, they are NOT public property.  

[lakeland27]

i was stealing his latest slogan NW.. . and if i were to encounter him..  i would be rather caustic. 😛