Sineater - psst...in here

[*crikey*mate*]

I just watched Materchef  US Season 5 Episode 1

(Thought I better start a new thread and not hijack the Australian one)

Plus we can add Hell's Kitchen and Kitchen Nightmares to this one too.

[*crikey*mate*]

was't pumpkin man perozo who went on to be runner up the year that Heather won?

[*crikey*mate*]

nope, can't remember anyone doing baked apples as their signature dish, far less stuffed with crab!

But I remember one little lass making a salad and when Ramsay asked her what was cooked she replied "I toasted the almonds"

hahaha

or

remember that lady, Colleen? who owned a cooking school and had never trained as a chef, and when Ramsay gave her griwef about it she said "I also teach good manners" ROFL

she had balls for  such a little meek thing, eh?

Oh, and that Marine dude from season 5 or 6 - Joseph? who demanded a fork to tasrte something and then challenged Ramsay to a fight in the car park?

ROFL

I really liked him too - but he was a bit of a tool - but thought with his military training he would be good

[*crikey*mate*]

Those on the spot functions used to happen to us allll the time at one place i worked.

In the resort, the hotel was on one side, then a boat marina with a shopping centre and the other side were all these private residential villas? sort of like town houses I spose, but a 2 bedroom one was like a million dollars.

And the residents were treated like VIPs as i guess they were big customers in the resort, so when they whistled, we jumped. They'd order room service to their houses at all odd hours and request the weirdest things (not just food) and the poor concierge would be sent out on the hunt to find whatever it was they had requested - even if we were packed and busy, we dropped everything for a residential request.

They would often decide they wanted to host a dinner party in their r4esidences on the spur of the moment, so all of a sudden, we might have to pull something out of our hats to cater a darned dinner party over at the village FGS, so we'd have to load up all the buggies with all the food, alcohol, a stove or whatever, linen, ice, tabkles chairs etc - but thank fully, the biggest they could host ion their homes was about 40 people max - but still took a lot of man power, especially on the spur of the moment kind of thing..

or some would come in on their yacths and we'd have to organize something on their boats

twas a nightmare

and cos they were VIPs, it wasn't just one department that handled them, depending on what they wanted would depend whether it was banquettes, Fine Dine or the Cove that was sent, but if it was busy, they might pull staff from all sections, so you were never safe

I'd often start service with 3 on saucier with me in the Fine Dine and end up running the section by myself, or go to set up a Banquet somewhere and have no freakin staff!

Was good though in a way, best place I did work as far as team work went, we all just got in and worked in whatever outlet needed help, so if the Cove was getting slammed, staff from another outlet would just slot in if they were spareish

I did learn a few other things there - about golf buggies (mode of transport around the resort - we transferred everything on them from food to equipment etc)

1) never park the buggy on the top of the hill with the lake at the bottom

2) never stall the buggy on the hill on the way up to Fine Dine (top of a hill) cos if it rolled back it rolled into the marina

3) Buggies don't handle corners very well

[renomarvinm]

You know, I've always wondered if you could actually DO ANYTHING with all of those kurnels of popcorn that didn't pop when you make popcorn - you know, that small handfull of unpopped stuff.  I've gotten so disgusted with them that I wanted to save a whole bucket of them, and then hit them with a blowtorch (subtlle, huh?) but I don't want to burn down my kitchen.  My wife's still fuming over the fudge.

[sineaterdoodah]

lol,bob,yes,there IS! grind them up, mix them with mashed potatoes,some salt and pepper,mold patties,after you chill the mix,and fry them in butter! 

i used to save them for a friend's chicken,ran out of cormneal one day,and tried this just for grins. they actually taste GOOD!

[*crikey*mate*]

I was going to suggest use them in a spud gun or slingshot, but Sin, you're suggestion is probably more socially acceptable

[sineaterdoodah]

SSSHHHHH!!!!!  you're gonna blow my bad rep!!!!!

[renomarvinm]

Hi sineater!!!  I had one other cooking adventure but, like all the others, it was a complete disaster.  It was simply the act of brewing coffee!  When I worked as a photographer for the police department in Las Vegas, they would give us free "Jail Coffee."  In fact, I had to remove my gun, keys, knife, pens, etc., and go to the jail to get bags of it.  The guard would buzz me in, and then slide two bags of jail coffee through the window, and then buzz me out.  Las Vegas was not spending much money on jail coffee.  It tasted like it was brewed in your car battery.  In fact, it was so horribly bitter that you HAD to cut it with white non-dairy creamer powder just to get it down.  People all over the office had their own jars handy.  They were everywhere.

One day, I put in an 18 hour shift on a major homicide, and I had to get back to work at 7 in the morning, two hours later.  I was the first at the lab that morning, and I headed over to the Mister Coffee Machine like a drowning rat heading for a log!    You know, sleep deprevation is like being drunk, and I was really punchy!  As I was starting to fill the Mr. Coffee Maching, I had a "bright Idea."  Honest!  This really happened!  I thought to myself - why not just put the stupid non-dairy creamer powder into the Mr. Coffee Machine along with the coffee grounds and brew it all at once!  So I Did!  I put in 2 inches of white powder in the little white paper in the machine and then covered it up with coffee.  I was about to pour in water, but I got a call.  I was out another 9 hours.

When I got back, I looked and felt like I had been embalmed.  People were all over the lab, and I noticed that the Mr. Coffee machine had been completely dismantled.  It had more parts than I ever dreamed of.  I asked Martha, our secretary, what happened.  Martha was from the deep south.  "I don't know," she said in her slow drawl.  "I poured water in, and white foam came out all over the floor like it had rabies!  I think it's busted."  Like a danged fool, I told her what I had done.  People laughed!  She chased me all over the lab, screaming, "You keep your white (deleted) (deleted) (deleted) away from that machine, and don't you ever go near it again!  She was great!

[icyfroth]

---

@renomarvinm wrote:

Hi sineater!!!  I had one other cooking adventure but, like all the others, it was a complete disaster.  It was simply the act of brewing coffee!  When I worked as a photographer for the police department in Las Vegas, they would give us free "Jail Coffee."  In fact, I had to remove my gun, keys, knife, pens, etc., and go to the jail to get bags of it.  The guard would buzz me in, and then slide two bags of jail coffee through the window, and then buzz me out.  Las Vegas was not spending much money on jail coffee.  It tasted like it was brewed in your car battery.  In fact, it was so horribly bitter that you HAD to cut it with white non-dairy creamer powder just to get it down.  People all over the office had their own jars handy.  They were everywhere.

One day, I put in an 18 hour shift on a major homicide, and I had to get back to work at 7 in the morning, two hours later.  I was the first at the lab that morning, and I headed over to the Mister Coffee Machine like a drowning rat heading for a log!    You know, sleep deprevation is like being drunk, and I was really punchy!  As I was starting to fill the Mr. Coffee Maching, I had a "bright Idea."  Honest!  This really happened!  I thought to myself - why not just put the stupid non-dairy creamer powder into the Mr. Coffee Machine along with the coffee grounds and brew it all at once!  So I Did!  I put in 2 inches of white powder in the little white paper in the machine and then covered it up with coffee.  I was about to pour in water, but I got a call.  I was out another 9 hours.

When I got back, I looked and felt like I had been embalmed.  People were all over the lab, and I noticed that the Mr. Coffee machine had been completely dismantled.  It had more parts than I ever dreamed of.  I asked Martha, our secretary, what happened.  Martha was from the deep south.  "I don't know," she said in her slow drawl.  "I poured water in, and white foam came out all over the floor like it had rabies!  I think it's busted."  Like a danged fool, I told her what I had done.  People laughed!  She chased me all over the lab, screaming, "You keep your white (deleted) (deleted) (deleted) away from that machine, and don't you ever go near it again!  She was great!

---

the coveted five-laughy face award

Poor Mr Coffee got all frothed up  😞

[*crikey*mate*]

ROFLMAO!

Reno, you're a cracker!

Spoiler

But why on earth did you fess up? You were in the clear man - no one suspected a thing!