Visiting Irishman From UK

Hi everyone ..top o the morning to ye..just passing by..though I would call in to see you
Tommy Loves Everyone... Im a 75 year old nutcase..
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Tommy Loves Everyone... Im a 75 year old nutcase..
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A guy goes into the confessional box after years being away from the Catholic Church. He pulls aside the curtain, enters and sits himself down. There's a fully equipped bar with crystal glasses, the best vestry wine, Guinness on tap, cigars and liqueur chocolates nearby, and on the wall a fine photographic display of ladies who appear to have mislaid their garments. He hears a priest come in: "Father, forgive me for it's been a very long time since I've been to confession and I must admit that the confessional box is much more inviting than it used to be". The priest replies, "Get out, you idiot. You're in my side".
Tommy Loves Everyone... Im a 75 year old nutcase..
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Tommy Loves Everyone... Im a 75 year old nutcase..
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Tommy Loves Everyone... Im a 75 year old nutcase..
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You Know It's Hot In Australia When! 1) The best parking spot is determined by shade not distance 2) Hot water comes out of both taps 3) You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron 4) The temperature drops below 32c and you feel chilly 5) You discover that in January and February it only takes two fingers to steer a car 6) You discover you can get sunburnt through your windscreen 7) You develop a fear of metal door handles ๐Ÿ˜Ž You break a sweat the instance you step outside at 7am 9) Your biggest bicycle accident fear is "What if i get knocked out and end up lying on the road and getting cooked" 10) You realise asphalt has a liquid state 11) Farmers are feeding there chickens crushed ice to prevent them from laying hard boiled eggs 12) The trees are whistling for dogs 13) While walking back barefoot to your car from any event, you do a tightrope act on the white lines in the carpark 14) You catch a cold from having the aircon on full blast all night long 15) You learn that Westfield Shopping Centre's aren't just Shopping Centre's, they are temples to worship Air-Conditioning 16) Sticking your head in the freezer and taking deep breaths is considered normal 17) A cup full of ice is considered a great snack 18) A black out is life threatening because your aircon and your fans no longer work. 19) No one cares if you walk around with no shoes on 20) You keep anything in the fridge, including potatoes, bread and clothing 21) People have enough left over beer cans to make a boat and compete in a regatta. (S.A joke) 22) The effort of towelling yourself off after a shower means you need another shower right away. 23) You will wait patiently until the day it starts raining to go on a run. 24) You worry your ceiling fan is spinning so fast it will fly off and Kill You 25) You Laugh because this list is so accurate 26) Share with ya mates so they can laugh too
Tommy Loves Everyone... Im a 75 year old nutcase..
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