Oh, Oscar!.........................
Anyone making jokes about Oscar Pistorius is just prosthetic! Too many Oscar Pistorius jokes already. Trying to come up with a new one is like taking a shot in the dark. His lawyer’s got a hard job ahead of him. Realistically, it looks like Pistorius hasn’t got a leg to stand on. Oscar clearly misunderstood when his girlfriend told him that on Valentine’s Day he had to 'take her out'. Oscar Pistorius is pleading not guilty due to temporary diminished responsibility. He claims he was legless at the time of the incident. Whatever happens in court, he still has a career. The IOC say he’s a front runner at the next Olympics for pistol shooting. Police reconstruction indicates that Pistorius lost it when, for his Valentine’s Day gift, his girlfriend gave him a pair of socks. New Valentine’s Day card: “Roses are red, violets are glorious. Never creep up On Oscar Pistorius.” Looks like he has an expensive lawyer. I hope Oscar can foot the bill. New evidence has been found outside the Pistorius home that completely acquits him of his girlfriend’s murder.... Footprints! She didn’t notice Oscar sneaking up behind her. It was the silence of the limbs. I see what Pistorius is doing. He is going to jail for 25 years and when he gets released… Bam! President of South Africa. That’s how it works over there, right? When Oscar Pistorius said he wanted to be just like able-bodied athletes, who knew he meant OJ Simpson? First Tiger Woods, then Lance Armstrong, and now Oscar Pistorius. I think Nike should start telling their athletes ” Just Don’t Do It.” Hollywood are doing his life story; it’s now going to be called 'Blade Gunner'. If found guilty he’s gonna have to take it on the shin. The Judge will say, "and the Oscar goes to . . . . Jail !!"
