At what age is it okay for a sleep over?

[givemeaspell]

For your son/daughter to allow their partners to spend the night (same bed) in your family home?

[freakiness]

I don't think I'd ever allow it in my home to be honest but never say never.

Nothing wrong with still doing it in a car Crystal and I'd say a lot still do that will never change.

Anyone ever tried in a moving Car? now that is an experience.

Yep, a young couple here who were passengers, doing it in a car, changed their lives. One dead, one quad, one driver charged.

[crystal**flake]

Did do something in the car as guy was driving ]:)

[**meep**]

Wouldn't have dared ask Eve you're right there I think very few of us would've had the courage to ask in my generation.

I know my parents allowed my brother and his partner but they were well in their 20's and already living together so my Mum said no point in saying not.

I figure it's one of those things I don't think I like the idea of hearing and knowing my kid is having sox in my house the same way I guess none of us would be overly thrilled to hear our parents or say overhearing our parents having sox :^O

lol, yes, thats how i feel

[kyliecrv]

She had a nice bf for close to 2 yrs, they broke up a few months ago. They didnt get that much 'alone' time, didn't have sex, I know this.

How do you know this?

I know this because we have discussed it, we've always had good communication and she doesn't lie to me. She doesn't need to lie, if they were active I would've had her at Dr for birth control. But I'm noit encouraging it.

We also talk about the few friends that are doing it, some have faced consequences at a young age!

[joz*garage]

lol Crystal, an old GF used to do something all the time, on the way back from York once driving her car, the car ended up in the ditch..whoops! 

[catsnknots]

From the age of 16 my son had group sleepovers... we had up to 20 sleeping in his bedroom. 

Often there were couples.... if you think they are not going to have sex at 16 and by not allowing the opposite sex to sleep over you will prevent it you are being delusional. 

Keep an open dialogue with your children... teach them the value of relationships and then also teach them that an STD or child is for life.... (well some STD's) 

I told my son that before he had sex with a girl he has to like her enough to give her 26% of his income for the next 18 years................. no protection is 100% safe and you can't force a girl into an abortion. 

[daydream**believer]

How many of us here thought they could ask their parents if they could sleep with their partners at 16?   I didnt.  I knew what the answer was going to be.

Well i didnt have sex till i was 17 anyway and even then, I would not of asked. I knew they would say no and i didnt want them to know i was having sex.

[daydream**believer]

"if you think they are not going to have sex at 16 and by not allowing the opposite sex to sleep over you will prevent it you are being delusional. "

Im not delusional to the possibility that my 16 year old may have sex, but that doesnt mean i have to make it easy for them by giving them a room and a bad to do it in.

I do/will have a very open dialogue with my child. We have talked about safe sex, birth control and pregnancy. But part of that dialogue will also be me telling her that 16 is to young to be having sex

[lurker17260]

As long as both parents know what is going on then I say 16. Better in your hose than in some alleyway somewhere.

I agree.  I think two of mine were about 17 and the other 18/19 when they first brought g/fs home for the night.  I saw it as a safety issue for all involved, including the girl.

Mind you they also knew there was no "revolving door policy' and if someone stayed they, both him and her, had to be prepared to look me in the eye over breakfast the next morning.

I believe it put us in a stronger position to talk about responsibility and respect than if we pretended we didn't know they were sexually active.

[lurker17260]

*doh* hit post too soon X-(

I also meant to say.  Now in their mid to late 20s they all have good strong relationships, 2 long  term, with independent, strong minded women, who I get on spectacularly well with.  So I must have done something right  😛