This post is just for cat because I want to ask you something/s.
It's that time of the year again and I just wanted to get your perspective on yourself now as compared to a few years ago when you first had the need to start this thread. Do you feel that your life has changed for the better or the worse? Also have you surprised yourself with just how far you have come in such a short time?
I'm just asking because for all the hurt and pain I have endured if I had my time again there isn't much I'd change as I am proud of the person I am now and I hope that you either feel the same or are at least finding yourself heading in that direction.
Time offers us the opportunity to see things from an entirely different perspective and even if you aren't, ( but I'm sure you must be ) I am proud of the woman you have become and how you've built yourself back up from the broken shell that you first were.
Lets hope this thread continues to give others going through similar the inspiration to keep putting one foot in front of the other.
MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE
Cyn I remember right at the beginning of this thread, when I could barely eat, sleep or even think clearly, you told me one day I would be able to look back and be proud of how far I'd come and how the pain would be so much less and I'd be in a position to inspire others who are hurting from a broken heart.
The 3 year aniversary is coming up soon and I'd have to say I am a lot happier. It hasn't been easy (as you well understand ♥) but every year it gets easier. I have no thought or feelings about the other woman. All my anger has gone and she is bit of a non entity. As for Mr Ex, it is very rare that I wonder how he is faring. My thoughts are taken up with my life.
I'm very proud of how amazingly strong I turned out to be. Who knew! I'm managing my life, I'm supporting myself and getting by. These 3 years have flown by!
Just recently my daughter was telling me how the mother of a friend of hers was cheated on and how she, the mother, isn't coping, constantly phoning her daughter crying and depressed. The point my daughter wanted to make by telling me this was how proud she was of me and how well I've done because I've put in the hard work to heal and the determination to be happy. It really is a choice. A conscious choice to choose which path you want to travel.
There are some days I feel a tinge of envy for those around me in loving relationships. I miss the simple things like just hanging out with your partner on lazy days or talking well into the early hours, sharing the every day stuff. I'm open to the idea of being in a relationship which is a huge leap considering I vowed never to risk it ever again! But at the same time I am content to be on my own for the rest of my life too.
But I have learned many lessons along the way.
I have learned to value myself. I have learned the person who does most of the investing and sacrificing of their needs for the needs of the other person is the one most likely to be betrayed. I allowed Mr Ex to de-value and then discard me. If I had loved myself enough I wouldn't have put up with his neglect for the last couple of years we were together. All my efforts to 'fix' our relationship was met with resistence. That's when I should have left. If I had done, I would have avoided the humiliation and heartbreak of being betrayed. I have learned not to stick my head in the sand and to trust my gut feelings. I have learned to spot the 'red flags'. And I have learned I am strong enough to make it on my own.
That's a very valuable lesson
Hello everyone 
I know the post wasn't meant for me but Cyn, I would like to say GREAT POST and Ms Cat GREAT ANSWER *hugs*
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL
Higs and Hugs, been thinking of everybody, hope things are going well for you all.
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Belated Merry Christmas to all, hope you all had an enjoyable and stress free day, yesterday.
