That is so nice to read Cat!
Freddie, your brother is way too young. I too can get how you are not getting much sense out of you SIL at the moment. How totally devastating.
I have spent 4 yrs in the world of childhood cancer. Thought it was all over but have to go back every month for check ups and blood tests for another 4.5 yrs. Was not expecting that.
Every single time we go in we see a new face. Kiddies from all over QLD have to come to our hospital for cancer treatment. Each time I see a new kid I feel my heart plummet, just knowing what that child and there parents will be going thru, and they have ni idea about it yet.
I think in some ways mentally it is easier for kids to cope as when they are the age my boy was when diagnosed, (6), they don't understand what the possible outcome is, and really, there is no need to tell them. But with adults, they know, and I imagine that is all they can think of.
My Mum got breast cancer 6 yrs ago. She rang me at work to tell me. my brother and I headed over. I stopped at bottle shop for some Scotch, unknown to me brother stopped at Target for a fairy floss maker. Between us mum got her favourite junk food made fresh, plus got her drunk enough she fell asleep on the couch so could at least stop thinking about it till the next day.
She had a mastectomy and has passed her 5 yr mark.
My aunt has also survived breat cancer, discovered 2 weeks before my Mum.
My grandfather died of Leukemia.
Mitchells grandfather ( his fathers side) died of a brain tumour 3 months after Mitch started his stay in hospital. He only lived for 2 months from being given diagnosis.
Mitchell's grandmother, again, fathers side, died of breast cancer just prior to Mitch's birth. She belonged to some fanatical church who refused to let her have treatment. ๐ฎ ( Potters Wheel or some such rot). mitch's Dad took 3 months off with long service leave to nurse her at home. At least the church "allowed her" to have morphine for the pain at the end.
Both Mitch's dad, his brother and sister all found out they have pre cancer bowel cells and have all had lazer surgery in the last year. His sister has also been diagnosed with MS a few yrs back.
When I look at the family history on both sides, I think maybe Mitch hardly stood a chance of not getting some form of cancer. Who knows.
All I can suggest is if you are able to have regular phone contact then do it. I don't mean ringing every day to ask about treatment, just to say "hi" sort of thing. Just letting him bring it up if he wants. I say this solely so he knows you are always thinking of him, as it can be very lonely. It may sound selfish and self serving, but knowing others are thinking about you does help.
I did not get much support from the person I thought would give it naturally, having been thru similar themselves, and only working 10 mins from the hosp. All I had wanted was a "hi", to remind me there is life outside of hosp. We spent the first 5 months living in the hosp, me in fold up beside his bed, then another 4 months in a unit within the grounds, so quite an isolating experience.
I am assuming from your posts that the outcome for your brother is not great Freddie?
(((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))
