Do you think Birth Mothers is an insensitive comment?

[donnashuggy]

Apparently Tony Abbott has withdrawn the comment and apologised.

[izabsmiling]

as for the Father's who have always loved their children.

Always ? 

[donnashuggy]

my Husband has a half sister in the UK .

A  forced adoption (stolen while her young Mum was sent out to a shop) through the SA 

So many sad stories Iza - it is extremely upsetting to watch.

Tony Abbott really needs to lift his game and be more careful with his choice of words, I don't disagree with the term but not for today.

[izabsmiling]

not right for an apology about denying them their right to be 'parents' in every sense of the word.

[lady*em]

I'm unclear as to why the term 'birth parents' is offensive?  Can someone enlighten me?  What exactly do they find offensive?

Is it the mothers, who object to any reference to a father?  Hate to tell them, but they didn't give birth by immaculate conception.  And yes, many of the fathers didn't stick around, which is why they had to give up their babies.  Rather than a shotgun wedding. 

Unfortunately at the time, many of the families of girls who fell pregnant 'shock horror' out of wedlock! - would not allow their daughters to get married to the father of the baby.  Instead, they thought it better to hide the whole thing and adopt the baby out.  That way the girl could just forget her indiscretion and move on with her life.  Not my way of thinking, but that was very often the thoughts back then. 

I know of someone who was adopted.  She found her birth mother and this is exactly what happened to her.  Her mother flatly refused them permission to marry, and being under 21, she needed parental perrmission.  They sent the girl away to a home, which forcibly took her child, then the girl was expected to just forget it happened.  Fat chance.  She left home as soon as she could and barely spoke to her mother again. 

Very sad all round, but the families of these girls need to take some responsibility as well.  If they had looked after their own, then these babies would not have been forcibly removed. 

I'm still  not sure why the term 'birth parent' is offensive though.

[topsidesoul]

No.

Birth mother is a logical term.

If he withdrew it I'm sure he was told to by an image consultant.

Image consultant in his ear 'election in september, election in September'

[izabsmiling]

lady em, today an apology was issued .These parents were denied the right to be FULL parents 

.....that's what the apology was all about.

To use the term 'birth parents' and thereby remind those parents that they were denied the right to be what they were ..the legal,rightful 'parents'  ...would seem to have rubbed salt into the wound and defeated the purpose of the apology ?

[janeababe]

how much MORE RIDICULOUS can all this get?

birth parent / adoptive parent/ legal guardian  ...

Correct terms for the correct reference.

Honestly, some people really need to just STEP BACK and breathe!

Talk about politically correct madness.  (ooohhh... better not upset anyone!)  sheesh!  ;\

[janeababe]

lady em, today an apology was issued .These parents were denied the right to be FULL parents 

.....that's what the apology was all about.

To use the term 'birth parents' and thereby remind those parents that they were denied the right to be what they were ..the legal,rightful 'parents'  ...would seem to have rubbed salt into the wound and defeated the purpose of the apology ?

..and how would you know! you are just making an assumption.

BIRTH PARENT means just that... BIRTH parent. Doest mean they then become the parents to raise anybody!

Dont turn this all around to make an agenda all about YOU & YOUR ISSUES again Iza....

[lady*em]

Mmm.. splitting hairs?  I know some people will take the most minute detail and be affronted by it, but really, in their current situation, they are birth parents.  I'm a birth parent too.  Fine, I raised my own children, but I'm still a birth parent. 

What is not being addressed whilst everyone is demanding apologies is what I mentioned in my earlier post - these girls would not have had their children forcibly removed unless their families agreed to it.  If their families had cared for them, and committed to care for their children, then they would not have lost them.  The babies could have been raised within the family.  But it was the family of the girl who were so horrified about the 'shame' these girls brought on the family, who were at the root of these forced adoptions. 

Many families also took the child and loved it and cared for it.  Many allowed the parents to marry, even if they were young.  And the marriages weren't all bad.  Have a chat to anyone in their late 60s about how many ' have to get married's' they know.

[izabsmiling]

absolutely Jane, what right should any parent who had their baby/child taken from them have in feeling that certain words used in a formal apology issued  to them are painful.