</
This thread is dedicated to my Mother and her recovery.
On Monday the 4th June 2007, while holidaying in the UK with my Father, my Mother was struck by a van while crossing the road.
Mum spent 88 days in various UK hospitals before finally being brought home back to Australia on the 30th August 2007.
She is currently in The John Whittle Nursing Facility with brain damage
I have set up this thread to keep you all updated on her condition and her improvements and hopefully one day, Mum will be able to read it.
On Monday the 4th June 2007, while holidaying in the UK with my Father, my Mother was struck by a van while crossing the road.
Mum spent 88 days in various UK hospitals before finally being brought home back to Australia on the 30th August 2007.
She is currently in The John Whittle Nursing Facility with brain damage
I have set up this thread to keep you all updated on her condition and her improvements and hopefully one day, Mum will be able to read it.
15th Oct 2008
Mum had no reaction to MIL's attempt at the sight cards on Day 2 either
The people from the rehab place have been to see her again and still say shes not responding enough to get into rehab.
WELL How the flip is she supposed to get better if NO ONE who is an expert on patients like this HELP HER.
I am getting more and more angry.
She has no neurologist. No specialist of any kind. All she has a bloody GP who writes her a script when she gets a flu, or infection.
Ive had it.
I watch shows like RPA etc and they have neuroligists on staff who do brain scans on people, but my Mum has been shoved in a home and is ignored.
Why does she not have a specialist who is helping her?
Why did her Neurologist say she is now beyong neurological help? She obviously still has a bloody brain injury. Isnt that what neurologists work with?
I want her to have another brain scan.
I am so angry today.
I am going to write letters to anyone and everyone.
Gawd, i dont even know where to begin or what to do, but im gonna do something
-------------------------------------------------
20th Oct 2008
I just sent my first lot of 'help us' emails out and withing seconds got a phone call from a woman from the 'Disability Info and Resourse centre' and she said she was so saddened by what we are going through and she is going to contact everyone she can and try to get us some help
----------------------------------------------
22nd Oct 2008
Ive had another email reply .
This time from the Royal Rehabilitation Centre Sydney.
The lady has forwarded my email to the head of the brain injury unit for advice and shes also given me contact numbers for private practitioners who may be able to undertake the assessments we want.
yahh
today i spoke to a lovely lady at the Brain Injury Assoc of NSW.
She asked a lot of questions and is going to refer Mums details to a case manager.
She will call me again on Friday to let me know whats going to happen
-------------------------------------------
27th Oct 2008
The medical Director of The Royal Rehabilitation Unit in Sydney wants me to get Mums GP to write him a referral for Mum.
That means he must be interested in taking Mum on as a patient else why would he want a referral?
Am going to organise all that today.
Also, the head of the brain injury unit is inquiries about referral pathways.
All going well so far
----------------------------------------------
Mum had no reaction to MIL's attempt at the sight cards on Day 2 either
The people from the rehab place have been to see her again and still say shes not responding enough to get into rehab.
WELL How the flip is she supposed to get better if NO ONE who is an expert on patients like this HELP HER.
I am getting more and more angry.
She has no neurologist. No specialist of any kind. All she has a bloody GP who writes her a script when she gets a flu, or infection.
Ive had it.
I watch shows like RPA etc and they have neuroligists on staff who do brain scans on people, but my Mum has been shoved in a home and is ignored.
Why does she not have a specialist who is helping her?
Why did her Neurologist say she is now beyong neurological help? She obviously still has a bloody brain injury. Isnt that what neurologists work with?
I want her to have another brain scan.
I am so angry today.
I am going to write letters to anyone and everyone.
Gawd, i dont even know where to begin or what to do, but im gonna do something
-------------------------------------------------
20th Oct 2008
I just sent my first lot of 'help us' emails out and withing seconds got a phone call from a woman from the 'Disability Info and Resourse centre' and she said she was so saddened by what we are going through and she is going to contact everyone she can and try to get us some help
----------------------------------------------
22nd Oct 2008
Ive had another email reply .
This time from the Royal Rehabilitation Centre Sydney.
The lady has forwarded my email to the head of the brain injury unit for advice and shes also given me contact numbers for private practitioners who may be able to undertake the assessments we want.
yahh
today i spoke to a lovely lady at the Brain Injury Assoc of NSW.
She asked a lot of questions and is going to refer Mums details to a case manager.
She will call me again on Friday to let me know whats going to happen
-------------------------------------------
27th Oct 2008
The medical Director of The Royal Rehabilitation Unit in Sydney wants me to get Mums GP to write him a referral for Mum.
That means he must be interested in taking Mum on as a patient else why would he want a referral?
Am going to organise all that today.
Also, the head of the brain injury unit is inquiries about referral pathways.
All going well so far
----------------------------------------------
30th oct 2008
Just had a great phonecall from my sister.
The head of the brain injury unit at Westmead received my email and rang Lourdes Hospital in Dubbo.
She wants them to get ALL of Mums files together.
She also wants to have a video hookup with Mums GP, my Dad and my sister to discuss Mums situation.
She wants all of this done before December because in December she will be coming to Dubbo especially to see Mum.
She is very very interested in Mums case.
This is fantastic.
Apparently she is a very very important person when it comes to brain injuries caused by accidents.
Basically when she tells Lourdes Hospital to do something, they better do it
--------------------------------------------------
31st oct 2008
My sister told Dad the latest news last night and when i called him he seemed very happy and he said to me
"Im proud of you Amy. Youve done real good"
----------------------------------------------
17th Nov 2008
So, i heard from my sis and the video conference went GREAT.
The Doc is coming up to Dubbo to see Mum on DEc 19th.
She has lots of ideas for getting mum eating via her mouth, getting her arms moving, and communicating.
She says Mum is progressing well and that a routine is very important for her. She is going to see about getting mum a regular physio when she comes up.
Amazingly, Mums brain scans and all reports from England were found and this Doc has been sent them all.
She is going to discusslots with Dad, Mums GP, and the staff at the nursing home when she comes up.
I asked how Dad was after the meeting and my sis said he seemed really happy.
So, all good at this stage.
Im so glad shes still coming up to see Mum in Dec
Just had a great phonecall from my sister.
The head of the brain injury unit at Westmead received my email and rang Lourdes Hospital in Dubbo.
She wants them to get ALL of Mums files together.
She also wants to have a video hookup with Mums GP, my Dad and my sister to discuss Mums situation.
She wants all of this done before December because in December she will be coming to Dubbo especially to see Mum.
She is very very interested in Mums case.
This is fantastic.
Apparently she is a very very important person when it comes to brain injuries caused by accidents.
Basically when she tells Lourdes Hospital to do something, they better do it
--------------------------------------------------
31st oct 2008
My sister told Dad the latest news last night and when i called him he seemed very happy and he said to me
"Im proud of you Amy. Youve done real good"
----------------------------------------------
17th Nov 2008
So, i heard from my sis and the video conference went GREAT.
The Doc is coming up to Dubbo to see Mum on DEc 19th.
She has lots of ideas for getting mum eating via her mouth, getting her arms moving, and communicating.
She says Mum is progressing well and that a routine is very important for her. She is going to see about getting mum a regular physio when she comes up.
Amazingly, Mums brain scans and all reports from England were found and this Doc has been sent them all.
She is going to discusslots with Dad, Mums GP, and the staff at the nursing home when she comes up.
I asked how Dad was after the meeting and my sis said he seemed really happy.
So, all good at this stage.
Im so glad shes still coming up to see Mum in Dec
21st Nov 2008
Well, it seems the day after the video link up, the Doc from Lourdes went to see Mum.
He is the Doc that went to assess Mum the day her trachy was removed months ago. He walked in the room and said "Val, lift your leg" and when she didnt he said to Dad "Shes not ready for rehab". Dad went off at him and kicked him put the room.
Anyway, he turned up at Mums room on Tuesday at 3pm. Dad opened the door and the Doc held his hand out to shake hands and dad wouldnt shake it.
Doc said he was here to assess Mum and Dad said "Are you stupid or totally incompetant? Its 3pm in a nursing home. You do realise that is nap time for the residents. And Val is having a nap. If you want to assess her, tell me in advance the day you want to come and come at 10am"
Dad then said "The only reason you are here now is because we have got your boss involved and you know you are in trouble for ignoring Val all these months"
Then Dad told him to leave.
Yahhhh for Dad
Dad later in the day saw Mums GP at the home and told her what had happened. She was confused as she had written to this Doc on 3 occaions in the past to notify him of changes in mum and to tell him he should re assess her. She had reply reports from him saying he had done that.
But, he has not been to see Mum since she first got to Dubbo.
Mums GP is going to notify the Doc in Sydney that he has been lying about going to see Mum and his reports are all made up.
In other news, dad says Mum has been good this week. He is talking to her about the Sydney Docs visit on the 19th to get her prepared for it
-----------------------------------------------
12th dec 2008
This week i was watching Oprah and it was about a woman who had had a stroke, Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor. She spent years recovering from it.
One thing she said in the interview that really touched me was that the woman she was before the stroke was gone. She and her family mourned that woman, cried for their loss and said their goodbyes to that woman and now, they have a new Jill who they love and help and support.
I think thats what we all need to kinda do with Mum. We have to accept that we are not going to get my old Mum back, but we have to love, help and support our new Mum.
I talked to Mum on the phone last night and she was really good. Miss 8 talked as well and Mum didnt cry this time.
8 days till Sydney Doc comes
-------------------------------------
19th Dec 2008
okies, have been on the phone listening in to the Doc while shes in with Mumj.
Her first concern was how Mum was sitting and how stiff she was so she is going to get mum on a medication called Gabapentin to relax her muscles and make it easier to get them moving again and then hopefully eventually she will be able to move them herself.
The medication is very expensive but she is also curious why Dad has to pay so much for Mums care and is going to have that looked in to as well.
She is going to get a regular physio for Mum.
Dad told him her concern over Mums elbow which he thinks is dmaged and she going to get that looked in to.
I talked to her and asked about the use of sightcards (My Mil uses them with Mum) and if its worth doing and how my MIL should use them and she told me yes, keep using them and she then told me the best way, which i'll tell MIL.
There were many nother things talked about, which i wont go in to but, it seems to be a really good thing.
My sis said the Doc would talk to Mum constantly and although Mum didnt respond she was totally focussed on the Doc
Well, it seems the day after the video link up, the Doc from Lourdes went to see Mum.
He is the Doc that went to assess Mum the day her trachy was removed months ago. He walked in the room and said "Val, lift your leg" and when she didnt he said to Dad "Shes not ready for rehab". Dad went off at him and kicked him put the room.
Anyway, he turned up at Mums room on Tuesday at 3pm. Dad opened the door and the Doc held his hand out to shake hands and dad wouldnt shake it.
Doc said he was here to assess Mum and Dad said "Are you stupid or totally incompetant? Its 3pm in a nursing home. You do realise that is nap time for the residents. And Val is having a nap. If you want to assess her, tell me in advance the day you want to come and come at 10am"
Dad then said "The only reason you are here now is because we have got your boss involved and you know you are in trouble for ignoring Val all these months"
Then Dad told him to leave.
Yahhhh for Dad
Dad later in the day saw Mums GP at the home and told her what had happened. She was confused as she had written to this Doc on 3 occaions in the past to notify him of changes in mum and to tell him he should re assess her. She had reply reports from him saying he had done that.
But, he has not been to see Mum since she first got to Dubbo.
Mums GP is going to notify the Doc in Sydney that he has been lying about going to see Mum and his reports are all made up.
In other news, dad says Mum has been good this week. He is talking to her about the Sydney Docs visit on the 19th to get her prepared for it
-----------------------------------------------
12th dec 2008
This week i was watching Oprah and it was about a woman who had had a stroke, Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor. She spent years recovering from it.
One thing she said in the interview that really touched me was that the woman she was before the stroke was gone. She and her family mourned that woman, cried for their loss and said their goodbyes to that woman and now, they have a new Jill who they love and help and support.
I think thats what we all need to kinda do with Mum. We have to accept that we are not going to get my old Mum back, but we have to love, help and support our new Mum.
I talked to Mum on the phone last night and she was really good. Miss 8 talked as well and Mum didnt cry this time.
8 days till Sydney Doc comes
-------------------------------------
19th Dec 2008
okies, have been on the phone listening in to the Doc while shes in with Mumj.
Her first concern was how Mum was sitting and how stiff she was so she is going to get mum on a medication called Gabapentin to relax her muscles and make it easier to get them moving again and then hopefully eventually she will be able to move them herself.
The medication is very expensive but she is also curious why Dad has to pay so much for Mums care and is going to have that looked in to as well.
She is going to get a regular physio for Mum.
Dad told him her concern over Mums elbow which he thinks is dmaged and she going to get that looked in to.
I talked to her and asked about the use of sightcards (My Mil uses them with Mum) and if its worth doing and how my MIL should use them and she told me yes, keep using them and she then told me the best way, which i'll tell MIL.
There were many nother things talked about, which i wont go in to but, it seems to be a really good thing.
My sis said the Doc would talk to Mum constantly and although Mum didnt respond she was totally focussed on the Doc
30th Dec 2008
Mum had a good Chrissy day.
At one stage her room was full with my Dad, my sis, my BIL, my niece, my nephew and his fiancee and my Nan.
When she first saw my nephew she got very very upset and that got him very upset but she eventually calmed down.
Dad says she seemed really happy when everyone was in her room laughing.
That got me upset because i would of loved to have been there as well.
Dad says she has been really good all of this last week and i can tell, that has had an effect on him as he seems a little happier as well
----------------------------------------------------
27th jan 2009
Hi all, the nurses from the rehab place in Dubbo went to see Mum last Friday.
They are looking into the muscle relaxer meds for Mum.
Some splints are going to be made for her hands to straighten them out.
And maybe ger her a new wheel chair thats easier for dad to push around
-------------------------------------------------
6th feb 2009
spoke to dad last night.
He says Mum has had a better week this week.
2 weeks ago she was taken off of her antidepressant and cut back to half of one. Her teariness last week must of been due to that.
Dad has also been to see legal aide for some advice.
See, if you hit a pedestrian here, your third pary car insurance will pay for their medical expenses and if they are permanently disabled, it will give them a payout.
We are wondering if the UK have a similar thing.
If the van drivers insurance could pay Mum a payout?
Dad has asked legal aide and they are going to look into it for him.
I think he's concerned about the cost of this new med they want to put Mum on. Its $300
Mum had a good Chrissy day.
At one stage her room was full with my Dad, my sis, my BIL, my niece, my nephew and his fiancee and my Nan.
When she first saw my nephew she got very very upset and that got him very upset but she eventually calmed down.
Dad says she seemed really happy when everyone was in her room laughing.
That got me upset because i would of loved to have been there as well.
Dad says she has been really good all of this last week and i can tell, that has had an effect on him as he seems a little happier as well
----------------------------------------------------
27th jan 2009
Hi all, the nurses from the rehab place in Dubbo went to see Mum last Friday.
They are looking into the muscle relaxer meds for Mum.
Some splints are going to be made for her hands to straighten them out.
And maybe ger her a new wheel chair thats easier for dad to push around
-------------------------------------------------
6th feb 2009
spoke to dad last night.
He says Mum has had a better week this week.
2 weeks ago she was taken off of her antidepressant and cut back to half of one. Her teariness last week must of been due to that.
Dad has also been to see legal aide for some advice.
See, if you hit a pedestrian here, your third pary car insurance will pay for their medical expenses and if they are permanently disabled, it will give them a payout.
We are wondering if the UK have a similar thing.
If the van drivers insurance could pay Mum a payout?
Dad has asked legal aide and they are going to look into it for him.
I think he's concerned about the cost of this new med they want to put Mum on. Its $300
9th feb 2008
legal aide has got back in touch with dad today.
His case has been given to a solicitor who has more expertise in this kind of field.
They seem to think that Mum will be entitled to a payment
------------------------------------------
13th feb 2009
Talked to Dad last night.
Legal aide has put him in touch with a lawyer from Newcastle. He is the recommended Lawyer by Motor Accident Authority of NSW for paediatric brain and spinal cord injuries.
He is driving up to see Dad at the end of this month.
At this stage, he will look into whether they can make a claim.
----------------------------------------------
21st feb 2009
Thursday nights phone call to mum did not go well.
She started crying the minute i talked and really got very very upset.
Later that night i called dad.
He said some special hand braces had been made for her to help her straighten her hands and wrists. Dad said they were working really well.
Then he told me that next week, Mum was going to be fitted for a new wheelchair (Dad has to buy it). One that will be easier for him to push around.
He says, once she has it he will take her for walks around the block, to the Japenese garden nearby and also across to the shopping centre.
Im not keen on the idea of Mum being taken to the shopping centre. People will stare, kids will stare, people she knows will see her.....i dont think Mum would like to be taken out the way she is.
I tried to talk to dad about it but as usual, he has made up his mind and theres no changing it.
I think, he is just wanting to do some normal things with Mum.......but will it be good for Mum?
My sister is also not keen on the idea but she hasnt said anything to dad
legal aide has got back in touch with dad today.
His case has been given to a solicitor who has more expertise in this kind of field.
They seem to think that Mum will be entitled to a payment
------------------------------------------
13th feb 2009
Talked to Dad last night.
Legal aide has put him in touch with a lawyer from Newcastle. He is the recommended Lawyer by Motor Accident Authority of NSW for paediatric brain and spinal cord injuries.
He is driving up to see Dad at the end of this month.
At this stage, he will look into whether they can make a claim.
----------------------------------------------
21st feb 2009
Thursday nights phone call to mum did not go well.
She started crying the minute i talked and really got very very upset.
Later that night i called dad.
He said some special hand braces had been made for her to help her straighten her hands and wrists. Dad said they were working really well.
Then he told me that next week, Mum was going to be fitted for a new wheelchair (Dad has to buy it). One that will be easier for him to push around.
He says, once she has it he will take her for walks around the block, to the Japenese garden nearby and also across to the shopping centre.
Im not keen on the idea of Mum being taken to the shopping centre. People will stare, kids will stare, people she knows will see her.....i dont think Mum would like to be taken out the way she is.
I tried to talk to dad about it but as usual, he has made up his mind and theres no changing it.
I think, he is just wanting to do some normal things with Mum.......but will it be good for Mum?
My sister is also not keen on the idea but she hasnt said anything to dad
27th Feb 2009
Spoke to dad last night.
On Tuesday mum was measureed for a new wheelchair.
The company who will make it will let dad know the cost within the next week or so. Then dad will say yes or no as to whether they start making it.
We are expecting the cost to be around $10 000.
Dad will used the money raised by the Bowls Club to pay for that.
On Wednesday the solicitor from Newcastle went to Dubbo.
He says at this stage he will get his firm here and a firm in England to look into the case and decided whether it is worth pursuing.
If it is, he will also look into the road conditions of the are Mum was hit.
I looked into that ages ago and found lots of info that road and traffic experts had sent numerous documents to Blackpool council telling them the road conditions were a pedestrian hazard and should be changed. I also found a lot of info that many people have also been struck in the same area.
dad was really happy with the man. he said he felt comfortable with him.
------------------------------------------------
2nd march 2009
Mum had a good weekend.
On Friday night i did my phonecall with her and at the time i was talking, my kids were near killing eachother in the bedroom.
I snuck down with the phone to let Mum hear them telling eachother off and attacking eachother.
Well Mum found it all hilarious. She was laughing heaps.
The each child got on the phone to her and rambled on about how mean and horrible the other sibling was.
She didnt cry at all.
---------------------------------------------------
5th march 2009
I just rang my sister for some news.
I'm not angry about this , I'm so upset and cant stop crying.
My Mums sisters arrived from the UK on Saturday. They been shopping and going to pubs and even ringing up people they met last time they were here (Mums friends) and having lunches and dinners with them, but they didnt bother to ring my Dad or my sister or go and see my Mum.
Not until Tuesday.
On Tuesday my Nan went up to see Mum at 1:15pm. At 1:30pm, Dad helps with the hairdressers at the home (He wheels the patients around to get their hair cut). So he left Nan alone with Mum
At 2:00pm he was walking back to Mums room and he heard my Nan yelling "Where have you been? Ive been stuck up here with nothing to do for an hour".
He walked in to find Nan was yelling that at the 2 sisters.
They all stayed for another 10 minutes then left.
As they were leaving they said to Mum "Bye, we will see you next Monday"
I know i shouldnt get worked up over this and i know all the things you are all going to say....but im just so so sad.
I want to hurt them, they way they have hurt me.
I hate them.
I hate feeling like this.
My heart hurts. I feel so sad and yes, so angry
Spoke to dad last night.
On Tuesday mum was measureed for a new wheelchair.
The company who will make it will let dad know the cost within the next week or so. Then dad will say yes or no as to whether they start making it.
We are expecting the cost to be around $10 000.
Dad will used the money raised by the Bowls Club to pay for that.
On Wednesday the solicitor from Newcastle went to Dubbo.
He says at this stage he will get his firm here and a firm in England to look into the case and decided whether it is worth pursuing.
If it is, he will also look into the road conditions of the are Mum was hit.
I looked into that ages ago and found lots of info that road and traffic experts had sent numerous documents to Blackpool council telling them the road conditions were a pedestrian hazard and should be changed. I also found a lot of info that many people have also been struck in the same area.
dad was really happy with the man. he said he felt comfortable with him.
------------------------------------------------
2nd march 2009
Mum had a good weekend.
On Friday night i did my phonecall with her and at the time i was talking, my kids were near killing eachother in the bedroom.
I snuck down with the phone to let Mum hear them telling eachother off and attacking eachother.
Well Mum found it all hilarious. She was laughing heaps.
The each child got on the phone to her and rambled on about how mean and horrible the other sibling was.
She didnt cry at all.
---------------------------------------------------
5th march 2009
I just rang my sister for some news.
I'm not angry about this , I'm so upset and cant stop crying.
My Mums sisters arrived from the UK on Saturday. They been shopping and going to pubs and even ringing up people they met last time they were here (Mums friends) and having lunches and dinners with them, but they didnt bother to ring my Dad or my sister or go and see my Mum.
Not until Tuesday.
On Tuesday my Nan went up to see Mum at 1:15pm. At 1:30pm, Dad helps with the hairdressers at the home (He wheels the patients around to get their hair cut). So he left Nan alone with Mum
At 2:00pm he was walking back to Mums room and he heard my Nan yelling "Where have you been? Ive been stuck up here with nothing to do for an hour".
He walked in to find Nan was yelling that at the 2 sisters.
They all stayed for another 10 minutes then left.
As they were leaving they said to Mum "Bye, we will see you next Monday"
I know i shouldnt get worked up over this and i know all the things you are all going to say....but im just so so sad.
I want to hurt them, they way they have hurt me.
I hate them.
I hate feeling like this.
My heart hurts. I feel so sad and yes, so angry
well, thats it.
Thats all the milestone posts transferred over from the old ChinWag thread.
Update on Mum now is that she has not been very happy. Shes been very sleepy and teary.
My Aunts left a few weeks ago.
All in all, for the 5 weeks they were in Dubbo, they spent 4 and half hours with Mum.
In that same 5 weeks, my Nan spent 3 and half hours with Mum.
My dad is also very down, since the clocks went back. he is now coming home to a darik house again each night and that gets him down.
My sister goes into hospital very soon to get her gall bladder removed.
I am going to Dubbo to see Mum on the 1st feb
Thats all the milestone posts transferred over from the old ChinWag thread.
Update on Mum now is that she has not been very happy. Shes been very sleepy and teary.
My Aunts left a few weeks ago.
All in all, for the 5 weeks they were in Dubbo, they spent 4 and half hours with Mum.
In that same 5 weeks, my Nan spent 3 and half hours with Mum.
My dad is also very down, since the clocks went back. he is now coming home to a darik house again each night and that gets him down.
My sister goes into hospital very soon to get her gall bladder removed.
I am going to Dubbo to see Mum on the 1st feb
