Someone's Mum has been found

[cherples]

Hopefully her family want to find her too

Decades of living on the street and abuse at the hands of those she loved made Noeline McCarron wonder if she could keep going. Then someone offered her a helping hand.

Leaning on a floral-print umbrella like a cane, Noeline McCarron hobbles towards a couch and sits quietly.

She has a slight hunch in her back and leans forward as she sits.

In her left hand she's clasping onto a trucker hat. A tropical shower looms outside as dark clouds gather and she's come prepared.

Thongs expose her battered feet which peek out from the bottom of a long black dress.

Her skin is worn and she speaks slowly, punctuating her words with a husky, persistent cough.

At 53, specks of grey are starting to emerge through her thick brown hair which she keeps short.

Now 16 months sober, Noeline says her senses are coming back to her.

She can smell and taste again and is observing things she had never seen before. More importantly, her state of mind is the best it has ever been.

"I'm enjoying everything," she says. "Getting up without a hangover, looking around and seeing four walls. I'm doing something I can be proud of."

Noeline moved to Australia in 1981, migrating from the North Island of New Zealand.

She married soon after and started a family in Sydney's western suburbs with her husband.

But the relationship didn't last.

"Things just didn't work out," she says.

"It's hard for me to say but I had to abandon my children to get out of domestic violence.

"I just ended up roaming anywhere."

the story continues at

http://www.abc.net.au/local/stories/2013/03/09/3711884.htm?site=farnorth

[the_hawk*]

Thanks Krazy 🙂  I imagine she has a few issues that slipped through the cracks of the system.

I will bow out now

[catsnknots]

Hell would freeze over before I abandoned my kids... 

Where did she leave the kids??

With the father??? With a foster family??  

I have read the article but do not have time to listen to the audio so was curious if it said more than the text. 

She had to abandon her kid because she was an alcoholic from what I can read... 

Does she deserve a second chance with her children??? I don't know, I guess it depends on how the children feel. Does being a recovering alcoholic allow you more sympathy or expectations that your children will want to have a relationship with you?? 

No.. i don't think so.. 

[azureline**]

Some partners in a marriage are abusive to their partner but not their children. Some of the ones who abandon the children probably think they have no choice.

[catsnknots]

I realise that unless you have been in a bad place, it is difficult to understand why people in the bad places don't do something that seems obvious to you. 

I did have an addiction... i did walk very close to this woman's footprints... 

but when I had kids I made changes... it is my duty to do what is right because I was the adult... 

What I don't understand is why people don't make the right choices..... but then again she probably did make the right choice in abandoning her children if she is an alcoholic. 

[krazy.kiwi]

I did have an addiction... i did walk very close to this woman's footprints... 

but when I had kids I made changes... it is my duty to do what is right because I was the adult... 

What I don't understand is why people don't make the right choices..... but then again she probably did make the right choice in abandoning her children if she is an alcoholic. 

One thing it took me (and a few friends) a long time to realise is that not everyone can or will react the same way in the same situation.  I have given up trying to figure out why and just accept that it happened and that the person involved did what they did.

This lady has realised what she has lost and is trying to repair the damage done. I think she knows she can't undo anything, but I feel she wants closure - even if it is just to know her kids are OK in spite of how she treated them.

I think it's wonderful that she has had the help she needed (in the end) to turn her life around.

[lionrose.7]

We can not judge this women because we don't know what she went through.

I can imagine being a victim of domestic violence may just want her to hit the bottle and try to forget.

A lot of victims are so beaten down they feel worthless and just walk away.

I saw one women whose husband had thrown her through a window, she ended up in a mental institution and used to sit cuddling a doll all day because she missed her children so much.

Heart breaking.

I feel sad for her and the children and hope they can see each other and be forgiving.

[catsnknots]

I don't judge this woman... I just don't get it... 

[bright.ton42]

Cats I'm truly surprised that you don't get it -  you have such an understanding of 

people who have or had mental/emotional  problems and you usually show such compassion , I've always admired that from you.

I'm not saying you're not being compassionate but I just think we  don't know the whole story - if she had a mental disorder and hit the bottle

then what hope was for her at the time?  I'd say very little. 

I just know what I read in the op too but I'd say there's much more to this than we know.  

And the ability to make choices is not always possible for someone.

[cherples]

I did have an addiction... i did walk very close to this woman's footprints... 

but when I had kids I made changes... it is my duty to do what is right because I was the adult... 

What I don't understand is why people don't make the right choices..... but then again she probably did make the right choice in abandoning her children if she is an alcoholic. 

She said she escaped because of domestic violence.

Who are we to doubt that?

She said she was so worthless and low she wanted to kill herself.

It surprises me that one who claims to understand mental illness can judge others so harshly.

[cherples]

. 

I just know what I read in the op too but I'd say there's much more to this than we know.  

And the ability to make choices is not always possible for someone.

The article went on to discuss how she moved from being homeless with no teeth to being able to get accommodation and start to recover.