The Railway Arms

[rabbitearbandicoot]

does anyone know where this is and how to get there?

[nevynreally]

I attended a funeral 2 weeks ago for someone seeking the Railway Arms.

Still not finding this thread amusing.

[nevynreally]

Still here. Try harder.

[freddie*rooster]

Rabbit, ask to speak to a social worker at the Hospital, they are there to help people in your situation.

[lady*em]

All interpersonal disputes aside, obviously having a disabled adult son and a very ill wife has taken a huge toll. I encourage you to immediately seek respite care for your son, and maybe consider a more permanent arrangement. I know that many parents of adult disabled children feel they are a failure if they seek care for their children. That it is their responsibility alone. 

But it can be a far better thing to have your son where the worry over his care is removed from you and he can be settled already should you be unable to care for him for any reason. That way your relationship can move back to a parent/ child relationship rather than that of carer/caree. There is help out there. See a social worker at the hospital as has been suggested.

Best of luck.  

[sandypas]

I just wondered if it is time to arrange permanent care for Andy so that he is catered for if something does happen to you and Sue.  You would still be able to take him out during the day but have some quality time for the both of you as well.  I think it will be enough for you to look after Sue when she comes home.  Hope things improve for you soon.

[kengillard]

I totally agree Sandy.  At least get Andy used to respite care...do you have access to the local GHCare programme? Just a few days a week, so he gets to know the people, and feels secure with them.

I'm sorry Sue is feeling so down....a terrible situation to be in. She's probably missing you and Andy too.

And just to let the poster know....the one that doubts your "story"...I can vouch for the fact that it's all true.....We've known the family for quite a while now..and live in the same town.

[rabbitearbandicoot]

Thanks all for the suggestions.

Andy is supposed to go to a work-experience place 3 days a week. Just lately (well the last several weeks actually), he hasn't been able to go for one reason or another - Dr appointments etc and now they are on holidays, so maybe we'll be able to get him back after the holidays.

Anyway, I reported this thread twice last night so eventually it will go I suppose???

[the_great_she_elephant]

Thanks all for the suggestions.

Andy is supposed to go to a work-experience place 3 days a week. Just lately (well the last several weeks actually), he hasn't been able to go for one reason or another - Dr appointments etc and now they are on holidays, so maybe we'll be able to get him back after the holidays.

Anyway, I reported this thread twice last night so eventually it will go I suppose???

In the meantime, Rabbit, just remember there are a lot of us here here thinking of you and wishing you strength and courage, even if we can't do anything practical to help you.:-x

[freakiness]

Thanks all for the suggestions.

Andy is supposed to go to a work-experience place 3 days a week. Just lately (well the last several weeks actually), he hasn't been able to go for one reason or another - Dr appointments etc and now they are on holidays, so maybe we'll be able to get him back after the holidays.

Anyway, I reported this thread twice last night so eventually it will go I suppose???

Rabbit, it sounds like you need more than a "work experience" placement. You need some respite where Andy is cared for by others to give you a break..  You need a break from the every day chores and he needs a break with other carers so that when it is essential it's not such an ordeal for him because he is somewhat used to other carers and another environment.

[azureline**]

Rabbit, as hard as it will be, perhaps you need to arrange an ACAT assessment for him, for ongoing respite care, with a view to a permanent place. By doing this now, you will be able to find something you would be happy with, for when you can longer care for Andy yourselves.

It would also give him some time to get used to it.

Hope Sue is feeling better today. 🙂