As mainly a buyer, I see it this way.
Feedback is not necessarily fair at all. In a perfect world it would be but some buyers are unreasonable, some are vindictive.
Bad feedback isn't the end of the world for a seller, although i do understand it might affect where ebay shows the ads or some such thing. What influences me more is how a seller responds to a neg and I think they always should. A short reply such as 'Contact me first if there's a problem, Full refund given' plus the fact a seller had all other positive feedback would be enough to reassure me as a buyer that the seller was ethical.
I think it was perfectly reasonable for the seller to try to negotiate a change in feedback by contacting the buyer, but quite frankly, if there was no response after one or two emails, then sending a dozen more was always going to be a waste of time.
I don't think sellers can always please everyone. If something breaks in the post they will have someone saying it wasn't wrapped well enough, when it may have been quite reasonably wrapped. But if they go to great lengths to over wrap it, they will be marked down on postage costs.
Feedback isn't always fair, I would say if any seller can sell for a year or two without a neg then they are doing well, it would be almost a miracle.
