How old is too old to have a baby?

[krylekathe1]

For discussions sake, let’s not get into age related infertility, or even higher risks or birth defects or genetic diseases.

Just curious as to what people think is ‘too old’ to be having a baby.

[davidc4430]

35 - 40

[chameleon54]

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@springyzone wrote:

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@krylekathe1 wrote:
For discussions sake, let’s not get into age related infertility, or even higher risks or birth defects or genetic diseases.

Just curious as to what people think is ‘too old’ to be having a baby.

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I'd say nature is a pretty good guide. One of the oldest natural conceptions/births i read about in Australia was someone about age 53.

There are probably some older in other countries but you couldn't count on being fertile at that age or older, it's not the norm.

I know with IVF etc much older 'mothers' can give birth & it's a baby, but not their biological baby. I suppose if they had had their eggs saved 30 years earlier it then would be, but for present day older women, the technology wasn't there 30-40 years ago.

Maybe it's about time we faced facts. No matter what makeup people use or surgical facelifts people might have, bodies age and the average life expectancy is around the 80 mark. Maybe a few years either side. But don't expect to still be top of your game till then. Just because a person is alive & breathing doesn't mean they're up to looking after young children or teens.

So.. I would say no children over age 60 & ideally before age 50. Gives the woman a fair chance of living long enough to raise the child. 

But really-we need to turn things around a little bit so women don't think it's fine to delay till then, we need women to realise that their 20s is actually prime time.

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Sorta ties in with a few other disscussions we have had lately doesnt it ?  At the risk of offending the PC police on the boards ........ AGAIN.......society and science is experimenting with all sorts of family relationships that are not naturally designed to produce children.  Its all about rights we are told. But what is forgotten is what about the rights of the child ?

Nature dictates that as we age our chances of conceiving children diminishes. If we keep ourselves super fit we can delay this process to a small extent. But essentually for most people the clock is well and truly ticking by the age of 40 - 50. Once science and social policy start to mess with the natural systems, children stand a much greater risk of not having the opportunity to grow up with parents and strong role models of their own sex and risk having older parents who no longer have the energy to assist them through their difficult, late teenage years.

IVF has a place for assisting young families who can not concieve naturally due to medical conditions such as blocked tubes etc. but once it starts to be used for people who where simply not designed to have children it ignores the rights of the children concieved and contributes to the white anting and slow decay of society.

 Test tube babies, made to order by donor this and cellular that with no links to the family concerned may be nice for the couples recieving the child, but run the risk of bringing children into the world who will never have a clear understanding of who their real father and mother are and unanswerable questions about their gifts, talents, looks and personal identity.  Its all about the " rights " of the couples, with the " rights " of the children completely overlooked.

The world is in the process of going mad !!!!

[lind9650]

When my eldest daughter was born, my mother was 45. A family friend aged 42 had a baby at the same time.

By the time my daughter was 25. married and a young mother of two, my mother was 70 and suffering dementia. She needed 24/7 care from me.

I often wondered how on earth my daughter would have coped if she was my mothers child?

Times are changeing, medicine is more advanced, but in the end it is up to a persons health and ability to provide for a child. I don't think 50 or even 60 is a good time to have a baby.

Erica

[this-one-time-at-bandcamp]

Until you can no longer get parts for them.

[not_for_sale2025]

If we are only talking about natural conception and the medical advice is to have a go, then I think any age is ok. But I think the medical advice should be carefully sought from reliable doctors. The right doctors will present the for and against information and weigh up the physical and mental ability of the couple to take on the responsibilities. There will always be good and bad outcomes, but that applies at any age.

[springyzone]

Children love grandparents. It's a special bond & all being well, grandparents can help parents out a lot.

My daughter has a mother in law who had 5 kids (2 sets of twins and one singleton) under 5. She says that it was a strain and some days she used to cry for her mother, who had died when she was 20. She said she really needed help. She was in her 20s when she had her children.

I know how wonderful it was to have my own mother to turn to & in turn, I am helping out my own children.

If you don't have children till later in life though, the children & grandparents might miss out on ever knowing each other. It's not the end of the world maybe, but it's a shame.

What i observed from my own friends is fertility seems to last till about mid 40s and that's fine but as I get older, I have noticed people's health seems to change more rapidly. So my the time you are 60, you may feel great & hopefully stay great... but things can change suddenly.

And as the previous person said, by the time you are in your 50s, suddenly your own parents need help.

[krylekathe1]

I’m 35. My parter is much younger (27). He’s keen for a baby (understandable). I kind of feel like I’m too old! I have an 11 year old.

Pros - financially both home owners, I get paid maternity leave plus can come back part time for 7 years. He has his own business, so works long hours but can be flexible. Also he’s young & energetic. Plus his parents are building near my house so it’ll mean I have their help with a baby (his mum doesn’t work). My dad is retired & helps a lot but lives 30 mins away.

Cons - pregnancy, illness, tiredness, backpain, no Botox during pregnancy, 11 year old is not keen on the idea, lack of sleep, all bedrooms at my house are upstairs & we’re not living at his, cesarian recovery time.

[chameleon54]

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@krylekathe1 wrote:
I’m 35. My parter is much younger (27). He’s keen for a baby (understandable). I kind of feel like I’m too old! I have an 11 year old.

Pros - financially both home owners, I get paid maternity leave plus can come back part time for 7 years. He has his own business, so works long hours but can be flexible. Also he’s young & energetic. Plus his parents are building near my house so it’ll mean I have their help with a baby (his mum doesn’t work). My dad is retired & helps a lot but lives 30 mins away.

Wow..... sounds like you have got it absolutely made. When our children where born, both myself and wife owned our own seperate businesses. Quite often the wife would take the baby to work with her, starting from 12 weeks of age. She owned a garden nursery and the customers where always happy to see the baby. Other days, I would stay home during the day and work evenings. Grandparents also helped out often. It took a real family and community to support and raise our kids.

Cons - pregnancy, illness, tiredness, backpain, no Botox during pregnancy, 11 year old is not keen on the idea, lack of sleep, all bedrooms at my house are upstairs & we’re not living at his, cesarian recovery time.

Double WOW ( or is the plural of WOW...WOW WEE ?........ )....No Botox during pregnancy  ???......There seems to be a constant theme through all of your concerns........... Not trying to be mean here, but kids are a 20 year 24/7 commitment. If your focus revolves so much around you,  maybe parenting is not the right thing for you. Why not skip the kids and take a world tour and buy a new Ferrari with the money you save ?

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[domino-710]

LOL.

[bushies.girl]

I think you have your answer, if you need botox, the you are def way too old to be considering having another kid